don't touch it, it's hot...

Deep, in the deepest darkest bowels of the country that has come to be known as england, there was a birth. A deep dark birth, heralded by portents and omens such as the barking of a cat, a three knuckled chicken and a hypersensitivity to possible portents and omens. Some say the birthing went wrong, others that the conception was so horribly violent and depraved that the embryo, filled with consciousness before it's time, was invested with an unexplained fear of Jelly and herring, and the smell of the two combined. Some say this is my only weakness. Some say it is my only weakness to encompass both jelly and herring. Some say i like the look of my own toes too much.

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