h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

i aint been arested yet but if im not in school during school hours i can be arested and fined several grand

Oh, I see. What do your parents have to say about your not going to school? Do they know you don't want to go to school? I know you go and hate school. I can understand that. Don't get into trouble with the police. I'll tell you about my friend with dyslexia. He dropped out of school and went to a therapist who specialized in dyslexia. My friend switched letters and numbers around so he couldn't write but he could read. The school gave him failing grades and he left. His therapist helped him see ways to do better and he went back to school and finished. If you put your mind to it and even get help, you could easily get through school!! What do you think?

ok sorry about the weight was on the phone to steph
um my olds have no major say in weather i go to school and i dont see a point to going as ive missed to much to catch up as the exams are 4 months ish away and ive already been off for 6 or so and it just dont rearly bother me much as il get an advanced education when i can and when im over this
the police would arest me and fine us because of the governments anti truency thingy and ive had the help and its not gonna be that helpfull just pissing annoying im sorry if this is starting to sound tempremental but im not fond of being told you should go back to school so i apologise if its sounding bitchy i hope your cold gets better by the way

I know it's really not my business. I don't usually tell people to do anything. School is school. I myself pefer to work. Well, I'm glad you're talking to Steph cause she likes you!! My cold, well, it's geting worse. And, well, I guess I won't be out walking in the snow for a while. Have Fun!!

i know that steph likes me well i hope your cold gets better

Actually, maybe Steph , well, she might, be in LOVE with you. I'm just supposing. I don't want to get in the middle here. BYE!!

ok adios

Olie, you can write me anytime!! But, I have to get off the Library computer. Bummer!

aye i wasnt saying that i cant i was just dont send a message unless i can get a reply but hey thats me
so hows things ?

Oh well, you know. Things are okay. My family and I are in court at the moment over something to do with aggravated harassment. I had to file for Orders of Protection and they want a trial. I don't get it, but to make a long story short, I love my nephew and he nearly died from negligence. I trust in God though, I do. My nephew is only seven years old. He's autistic and he is in school. I'm having to stand up for him at the moment. This week is a rough one. Oh well, I will just say what I have to say to the Judge if I have to get up on the witness stand. How about you?

well at least you have faith witch is more then i can say i have at the moment

Aye, it's easy to lose faith. Somehow I know that things turn out for the best in the end. I hope God doesn't like -forget me- or something. I am not working because of all of this. There have been a series of hearings and so on. I have applied for a few jobs anyway. So, I get out of the house by coming to the library and writing to you and doing h2g2 stuff!! That's about it for now anyway. Do you have a religon? I'm Presbyterian.

i have no religion and i hope you get the jobs you applyed for

There's a new store that just opened in town. I've been told I could probably work there. Yay work!! Money always helps although they don't pay cash. If you are at home all day, try to put the A.R.M.Y. badge on your PS!! I tried and finally got the SPOOKS badge on my PS. It'll give you something to do and it's not that hard. I'll tell you how to do it you want to or Commander BL can send it to you and you can paste it on. Fun, Fun!!

me and bl dont get on to well and im not to botherd rearly

Yeah, I don't blame you. I spent atleast three hours on my PS. BL and I are in a strange place! We better stick Steph at the moment! Know any good jokes?

no good ones but heres one that made me laugh

a kid runs up to his grandad saying "grandad grandad can you make a noise like a frog " and his grandad says "no i cant " and all through the day the kid is asking him the same question and at the end of the day the grandad is pissed off and asking the kid "look why do you keep asking me if i can make a noise like a frog " and the kid says "well mummy said that if you croak we can go to disneyland "
*insert drumroll here*

Very funny!!
Okay, Here's one for you-

A Night Under The Stars

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson went on a camping trip. After a good meal and a bottle of wine they were exhausted and went to sleep.

Some hours later, Holmes awoke and nudged his faithful friend. "Watson, look up at the sky and tell me what you see." Watson relied, "I see millions and millions of stars." Holmes asked, "What does that tell you?"

Watson pondered for a moment. "Astronomically, it tells me there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets.

Astrologically, I observe that Saturn is in Leo. Timewise, I deduce that the time is approximately a quarter past three. Theologically, I can see that the Lord is all powerful and that we are small and insignificant. Meterologically, I suspect that we have, a beautiful day tomorrow. What does it tell you?

Holmes was silent for a minute, then spoke, "Watson, you idiot, some bastard has stolen our tent!!"

that was good

Okay, here's another one

The Beer Prayer

Our lager
Which art in barrels,
Hallowed be thy drink,
(I will be drunk)
At home as in the tavern
Give us this day our foamy brew

And forgive us our spillages,
As we forgive those who spill against us,
And lead us not in to incarceration
But deliver us from hangovers.
For Thine is the beer, the bitter,
and the lager

Forever and ever,

Barman