h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Some fantastic quotes there Feisor. Brilliant.

That procrastination stuff....it was the precurser to Man Flu.

Boy! Do I feel rough or what!

Still, gotta look on the bright side. It'll be out of the way by Christmas

Are you not well? Awwww .....

The one I really feel sorry for is your good lady

Rum is a good medication - it won't cure the flu, but if you have enough you'll have such a bad hangover you won't even notice the man flu

Mrs Benson? Suffering?...It's her moral duty Ma'am! Her moral duty I tell you

Lordy...They all suffered last night; I made sure of that!

According Mrs Benson, when I wasn't doing the dance of the dying swan and hauling up enormous balls of muck of my chest and coughing like a consumptive.

I was snoring like a sweaty, fat rhinoceros....She loves me really...just not very much at the moment.

Rum you say? I was chatting with Mrs Ozarch..a complete and utter, good egg, nutter on the archers board and she recommended booze too.

What is it with you Aussies and Satan's potion?..I happen to agree it's a fine and dandy tincture especially with Coke.

Suffer you - everyone around you is

Actually, dark rum is the one drink that is totally off the menu for me - I've found that not only does it give me the worst hangover in history (except saki - but that's another story ) it make me really aggressive, and I mean NASTY. So no more dark rum - ever!

Black velvets though make me love the world (indiscriminately )

Please give my sincere sympathies to Mrs B

And behave!!!

Whoa! So Dark Rum is Punching potion?

Weird isn't it how some peeps are affected that way. I had a mate like that...with any drink. Very odd! It was like watching someone undergoing some lycanthropic transmogrification. Man to monster in matter of a few minutes.

Then it was fists to punching stations and because he was small....He'd get a right royal pounding! He vowed never to drink again and he hasn't touched a drop for Oh must be 25years.

Myself on the other hand, I just get sillier and sillier. Hard to believe but it's true.

I actually died last night. But, I think I've broken it. woke up at mid day covered in sweat slime so...hopefully, that's the worst over.

Colds always beat seven shades of tar out of me for the first few days and then it goes to normal mode.

Man Flu! PAh! Ebola's nothing!

Well, I'm normally a very happy drunk, though I must say that these days I tend to do the "moderation" stuff. The hangovers get worse when you get older

Good to hear that you are getting better - or at least recovering

I wonder if death by Ebola is at least a quiet way to go

Not if I had it it wouldn't be!...I'm a man remember!

How could I forget

I'm off to bed now - G'night

Sleep quietly

Hello Feisor..!

I hope this finds you well!..Niceties over..I'm very excited!

It's so silly and barely worth reading..

Mrs Benson and I are going to have brekkie together tomorrow...Yes!

It's freezing here in dear old Blighty.I mean FREEZING! ICE and frost and stuff..Bludddy cold -3

So..tomorrow we're having a full English, cooked on a camping burner, whilst sitting out in a beautiful, frosty valley. Coffee from a thermos and wrapped up like polar bears!...

It'll be a scream...Then I have to thump off 250 miles to Manchester to see my brother...Brilliant!"

Life is GOOD.....and very silly!

Freezing our bits off and eating brekkie!...BRILLIANT!

As long as it's the unimportant bits that freeze off

Give Mrs B a hug - that'll keep both of you warm

Or take a flask of brandy with you (for medicinal purposes only of course)

Have a wonderful time!

Hello feisor...How are you?

I know you're splendid , but courtesy insists!

The Brekkie was a scream!

We took off and trundled down a very narrow and rutty lane which was filled with lake sized frozen puddles, just as well ye olde Volvo is 4x4.

We pitched up at the most beautiful spot. Frost covering everything..very beautiful.

I popped the tailgate and cooked up sausage, bacon, eggs, mushrooms, and toms whilst Mrs B drank coffee and read her paper!

It was surreal! Sheep in the field, their breath puffing out in little whisps of steam. The frost glinting in the watery, early morning sun. OUTRAGEOUSLY lovely. Everything was pure white!

The Trip to Manchester was...EVIL! But the trip home wasn't.

Bro was...Bro and sis in law spoilt me rotten!!

So Chumblie..what are your plans for Christmas?

Christmas? What's that?

No - I've told everyone that we're on strike for Ex-cessmas and I mean it.

No decorations, no tree, no Christmas dinner, no overstretched credit card - gifts only for those under 5 feet and then only if it can be bought on line. No stress .... bliss

It's all too much and I'm too tired to participate - I sent out the usual cards with my usual bit of doggerel but only to keep Mum happy - I'll post it to my journal on the weekend (maybe) as I have done in past years.

But you sound like the type who might enjoy the tradition, more power to you

Sounds like you had a great brekkie and a good trip

You Poor sausage! Sounds like a nasty case of the 'I doh wannas'

Now, here's a neat trick if Ex-cessmas isn't your bag. CONVERT! Yes, announce 'loud and proud' that you've become a...take your pick.

It might work..It didn't for an old teaching friend of mine though...He's a Jehovahs Witless..They don't 'do' christmas either. I make sure he's the first one to receive a card every year December the 1st..flop...What's that on the door mat? Open 'God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen'....Benson! You %$£&^%ing B^%$£$"£"d!!!!

A nice idea but I don't have to go to that extreme - the family and friends know that when I "go Grump" I mean it

And, to be honest, I do buy gifts for the people I love - I just refuse to do it at Excessmas. I much prefer to buy gifts for no reason other than "I saw this and thought that you might like it"

Happy Christmas eve Feisor..I know you don't like it...but...love and best wishes are sent your way from Blighty!

Back atcha!!

If you go to my space my latest journal has my bit of doggerel for Christmas.

I hope that you and yours have a great Christmas and a wonderful New Year

Hello feisor, you old misery guts
I'd love to 'tune in' to planet feisor but....How the hell do I do that?

See...I am a numpty drongo!

YEAH....I'm a dunder head AND PROUD!

To go to my space simply click on my name - when you are there look for the word Journal and click on it - easy!

And while you are there hit the "Add to Friends" link and you will be informed of any future journals, but there are never many so

Oh...I'm back...How did that happen?

This time travel business confuses me. I'm sure I met myself, before I was born, getting from your Christmas journal thing, back to here.

Boy it's cold here in Blighty! Minus lots, snow yesterday. That made for an interesting trip to work..slither slide...dodgy!

Happy New Year!

Welcome Back!

It's ing hot here - and I'm back to w*rk tomorrow

At least the office is air conditioned