h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Entry: Non Timetus Messor: The Blue Öyster Cult - A4329173
Author: AgProv - U538194

In full acceptance that as it stands and without a major rewrite, this piece doesn't quite cut the mustard yet for Peer Review.

Still, as I said, it was fun to write!

All comment and criticism gratefully accepted.

A nicely written piece of work. In an ideal world, it would be good to see entries like this having some luck in PR, but in the meantime, welcome to AWW!

I particularly enjoyed the song analysis/ Spinal Tap comparison.

sprout

Hi Sprout!

Thank you for the words of compliment - it does make me wonder if anyone's written up Spinal Tap yet for the Guide, there might be an opening here?

And also it suggests a conversation thread - what is YOUR Spinal Tap moment in the life and work of your favourite rock band? Please tell all within the four suggested categories of

i) Grossly bad-taste lyric;
ii) Failed stage prop or ill-advised pose;
iii) Banal obersvation elevated to high philosophy;
iv) The ineffable "Lick My Love Pump" moment, where the romantic side goes slightly skew-wiff.

B.Ö.C. frustrate somewhat - on the one hand, possibly the most intelligent heavy rock band ever, with oodles of musical talent , creativity and brio. But on the other hand, when they clonk, they clonk big-time: like Manchester City, either sublime genius or crocked carthorses with no in-between!

Enjoyed reading this despite knowing nothing about the band and not having a favourite rock band to answer your 4 questions with. Well put, enthusiastic, intelligent, appreciation is always good to read.

So, what do you want to do with this AgProv? Do want to try tailoring it to an EG piece, or to leave it as unEg eligible? Or, of course, you could do both, making two entries.
Waz

"Apparently there is a moment in every live gig where all five members of the band don electric guitars and get up front to share the riffs. (even the drummer). As a former editor of the NME said, none of the band is much over 5'7" in height, so when they all don Strat guitars," it makes them look like the Five Dwarves of Heavy Metal: Sleepy, Grumpy, Tiny, Dozy and Allen Lanier" (I've never seen them live: I do regret this) "

Funny, funny, funny!
Sounds not only like an ST moment, but an April Wine one as well, cf "She's a Roller".

Which leads to King Crimson.

I seem to remember a moment back in 1984 (was it?) when I saw them live during their 18th incarnation, this one with Belew and Levin, and some odd dude sitting on a stool wanging an electric ukelele... where was I?
Oh, where there were three guitars and two drum kits in operation while I held my ears in pain. This was before I realised that I needed earplugs more than most people. I don't necessarily hear better, just more.

Oh, what's the April Wine/KC connexion?
"21st Century Schizoid Man",
which BOC also used to mess around with in concert.

Thanks, TonsilRevenge!

I'm not sure where exactly it's going to go from here - I have an idea that the necessary standard for PeerReview will make the piece into nothing more than a factual dry-as-dust eaasy listing discs and personel changes with no room for opinion, save perhaps in the form "The 1978 "Mirrors" album was perhaps not up to the standard that fans expected from the band, and the cross-over into Country and Western which is evident on some tracks sits very uneasily with heavy metal. The band have undeniably manifested a C&W twang before - "Then Came The Last Days of May" on their first LP is very clearly C&W influenced and could easily be performed straight by a Nashville artiste who doesn't get holier-than-thou about the drug references - but here, the marriage is an uncomfortable one and is doomed to divorce"

Not sure about the April Wine / B.Ö.C link - I'll have to research!

But for another classic Spinal Tap moment, I cherish the Deep Purple in Concert (live at the BBC) double album, circa 1970.

DP do a twenty-minute long, definitely too long, version of "Space Trucking" and somewwhere in the middle of the improvisations, they audibly and clearly lose it completely... you can hear the bass player desperately sweating over maintaining some kind of beat for the lads to follow, but the other four have clearly lost the plot and are stuck trying to find it again. This has to be heard to be believed, but it's all there on the album, as they struggle to get it together again!

And yes, five Strats going all at once, at least two in the hands of musicians unfamiliar with them, must be a lell of an ear-destroying racket... I'm sure the live version of "ME-262" , where nonoe of the band seems sure how to bring it to a conclusion, is that moment in the history of BOC!

By coincidence I came across a reference on a google search to this group as being 'Celtic Rock'. Thought that surprising after reading this. Any grounds for it, do you think?

About where to go with this entry - I agree it would have to be a pretty different entry for the EG. I actually only asked because of the 'yet' in your first post. Wouldn't have occurred to me otherwise.

Though I'm now asking myself if the truly devoted fan might not be unable to rest until there was an EG entry ... .

"Celtic Rock"?
Um. No. That don't sound right.

Hmm, evidently I missed the collaboration LP they did with the Chieftains and/or Christy Moore. Isn't there that bit at the climax of the stage show where all the band members tuck uillean pipes under their arms and come down and trade riffs....

Let me see now...uniquely in the history of North America, we have a group of musicians, none of whom has ever been known to lay claim to any form of Irish ancestry whatsoever.

"Roeser" (or Röser)suggests German-American. (So among other things he should REALLY have known better about that umlaut, as in German it converts "Oyster" to a pronunciation something akin to "Easter".)

"Bouchard" has a hint of French-North American about it, as does "Lanier", while "Bloom" and "Perlman" hint at an ancestry as far removed from bacon butties as it is possible to get!

Although James Joyce, in that fine novel about Dublin, did have lead characters called "Bloom". Is this, I wonder, the connection? After all, the lyrical incomprehensibility of "Seven Screaming Dizbusters" and the non-sequeterial word-games in "She's as Beautiful As A Foot" suggest somebody was reading "Finnegan's Wake" under the influence, and then decided to write a couple of songs....

Comically informative and yet fully factual, you've cranked the dial straight to 11 on this piece

Not that it matters, but trivia is always entertaining. The original name of the band was 'The Great White Underbelly' but was changed as it was to "60's" for what they were evolving into as the music progressed. Besides which GWU sounds way to eastern block, why you can almost smell the cabbage cooking now

Seriously though, you write with style, grace and flair. Though other forums may be to blind to appriciate that, we here are an enlightened lot and not the least bit anal retentive. So cut loose and submit more to us, we'll welcome the work with open minds as well as open arms .

Spynxxx

Thank you Spynxx!

Just a quick note to say

a) I've expanded the entry slightly, mainly by adding more on the amazing Patti Smith (a brief discography of the "sixth B.Ö.C. member" in her own right, as there isn't a Guide entry on her anywhere - mine seems to be her sole namecheck in the whole of h2g2)

b) If you have enjoyed this Guide entry, why not search on "Cheadle, Cheshire" for a not entirely serious discussion of one of the snobbier, more Hyacinth-Bouquet-leaning, parts of my local area?

c) I am also writing a more serious Guide entry on military history: I picked up a scrappy dog-end in the Flea Market called "On The Influence of Tanks in World War Two" and I've been intermittently turning it into a more in-depth essy on the topic. Slightly drier and more historical, but not without interest. At present it's about 80% complete.

Thank you!

Hi Agprov!

Just been reading through your AWW article on B.O.C. and I think it's fantastic. Now that you've done your 'opinion piece' on the band, their triumphs and disasters, might you consider doing a piece on them for the EG? All of the info you'd need is already there, obviously, so it's just a case of turning your own opinions on B.O.C. into a strictly factual entry. I'd love to see an entry on them in the EG!

Paully

*waves to Paully*

I'm posting to let you know that this piece was voted on by the UnderGuide Miners to be an <./>underguide</.> entry with the aim of featuring it as such on h2g2's Front Page one week.

Congratulations are due for that in itself .

There is however one problem with Front Paging it, and that is the extent of some of the song lyrics quoted. A general rule of thumb puts a limit of four lines on this before the BBC has a worry about copyright.

Would you be happy with the creation of a revised UG copy of the entry that stays within the BBC's limits and can be featured on h2g2's Front Page? This is something that could be discussed here on this thread or with an UnderGuide Gem Polisher. If you were happy with this the Polisher would also cover any other final revisions or tweakings that you might want or they might suggest.

Whatever your choice, congrats again, and thank you for contributing here.

Oh, I certainly wouldn't want to steal the thunder from getting an UG entry - it's just that it seems (to my mind at least) like it's only a question of a tiny bit of work to reshape this into an EG entry too, as it's so near to being an EG entry already. Just thought I'd mention it!

And yes, hearty congrats on it being recommended for the UG slot on the front page!

Paully

I didn't take your post as any thunder stealing attempt, Paully. It would be if AgProv wanted to reshape and PR it.

Even more to have both perhaps? UG a lyrically shortened version of this if AgProv doesn't object to that and EG a slightly reshaped version.

Three for just a little more than the price of one .

Waz

Sounds like an ideal solution to me!

Many apologies for being tardy about replying!

This was due to installing a new computer at home. This is a million times faster than my old pre-Stone Age job AND capable of accepting peripherals like digital camera and CD burner - it was just that the modem was throwing wobblies and refused to work. Combine this with my employers having a crackdown on staff using the Internet at work for personal purposes - as they do from time to time, miserable -----, and I've just had a frustrating Internet-free week.

Anyway, I'm back.

Thank you for the honour of Front Page status, I am feeling distinctly chuffed about this.

Yes, I agree the quoted lyrics should be chopped a bit (both myself and the Nearly Beloved have had postings modded from the BBC's music sites in the past for quoting too much lyric.)

Maybe if I go in and trim the lyric a bit, or replace?

Cheers all

AP

I have now chopped the quoted lyrics: the extract from "Veteran of the Psychic War" sub-heading the Michael Moorcock section is now cut to two lines, and elsewhere (in the "Spinal Tap" section) I have quoted the first four lines of "ME-262", which concurs with the BBC's stated limit, with two lines taken from different places elsewhere in the song quoted seperately, in an appropriate context, elsewhere.

The only other quote I can think of is the opening line to Patti Smith's version of Van Morrison's "Gloria", which is "Jesus died for somebody's sins - but not mine!"

Elsewhere, I've just quoted song and LP titles.

Is this OK?

And at some point (after returning to "Norfolk" and giving it the final cuts and flourishes necessary for EG, as I'm sure Paully might consider this more immediately pressing) I'd be glad to come back to B.Ö.C. and rewrite this for EG!

And thanks to the Underguide Eds for the honour!

Hey AgProv - Great news, on getting the UG entry, on being willing to give it a little twist-ette to make it EG-suitable, and on the progress of your County entry too!

Paully