h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

"Half a loaf of wholemeal bread
and a side of Jersey Cow"

Shazam! the fish flicked all his fins
and as if from thin air,

A dandy sort in hobnail boots
turned up in a wicker chair.

His boots were clothed in lilac spats
Which looked a trifle strange

His head heaped with hundreds of hats,
which in height order he arranged.

He pursed his lips, spitting cherry pips
At truly awesome range.

NB.Passing Editorial Note, folks. Don't despair if simul-post gives us the occasional six-line stanza, that too occurs in traditional ballad form, and straying directions are OK for nonsense anyway.
Onwards, doggerellers.

The robin, aye, the robin came
And seized a cherry pip

And that robin (for 'twas the same)
fell over (its' leg was giving it gyp).

"Ye see me now," the Robin said,
the pip dropped from its beak,

"Without a friend", but with twisted head
the injured Robin felt too bleak

The dandy reached with languid hand
And drew the robin near

Then tied him up with tape of worm
And sat him in the chair

With languid hand he taped him up
And tied him really tight

Then 'neath the Christmas pudding tree
He settled for the night

The tree was lit with brandy flames
That never were put out

Until they called last orders
Down at the Tickled Trout

Colin the Carp (remember him? -
the fish that flicked his fins)

Said "Serves you right, you silly bird,
Pay back for all your sins!"

"I have not sinned," the robin said.
Said Colin, "That's a lie!"