h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Yes, 'tis best to be of good cheer
's easily done by drinking beer
Or wine - at a pinch
But try not to flinch
When a cop car tags on to your rear!


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One of the signs of old age

One of the signs of old age
(Hooray for that wonderful stage)

One of the signs of old age
(Hooray for that wonderful stage)
Is a droop of the chin

One of the signs of old age
(Hooray for that wonderful stage)
Is a droop of the chin
As you dribble your gin

One of the signs of old age
(Hooray for that wonderful stage)
Is a droop of the chin
As you dribble your gin
And read and re-read the same page...



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The young of today have no style

The young of today have no style.

I'm serious, so please do not smile.

(where have you all been? have you all got a life? how does one do that? helpful hints please) jx




The young of today have no style.
I'm serious, so please do not smile.
Their outfits confuse me

The young of today have no style.
I'm serious, so please do not smile.
Their outfits confuse me
Their sayings bemuse me

The young of today have no style.
I'm serious, so please do not smile.
Their outfits confuse me
Their sayings bemuse me
I need to lie down for a while

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It's been four days since the last post

It's been four days since the last post
"Where have you all been?" asks the host

It's been four days since the last post
"Where have you all been?" asks the host
"Did all pooters crash?"

It's been four days since the last post
"Where have you all been?" asks the host
"Did all pooters crash?"
No, none of that trash,
The bugler's been scared by a ghost.


When I hear the strains of Reveille

When I hear the strains of Reveille
I get all sniffy and pally

When I hear the strains of Reveille
I get all sniffy and pally
Then I go back to sleep

When I hear the strains of Reveille
I get all sniffy and pally
Then I go back to sleep
Into my hanky I weep

When I hear the strains of Reveille
I get all sniffy and pally
Then I go back to sleep
Into my hanky I weep
Recalling that last fatal sally.


'Twas crowded in Mornington Crescent

'Twas crowded in Mornington Crescent
And everyone was terribly pleasant

'Twas crowded in Mornington Crescent
And everyone was terribly pleasant
Till it started to rain

'Twas crowded in Mornington Crescent
And everyone was terribly pleasant
Till it started to rain
So we got on the train

'Twas crowded in Mornington Crescent
And everyone was terribly pleasant
Till it started to rain
So we got on the train
Is Dollis Hill on this line , no it isn't


When she found herself lost in the city