h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

is it a ?

Damn

YES.

Y'see, I always said i was telepathetic!

Yes... that's all very nice Ictoan, but we still have 19 more questions to go...

Is it red?

Ah, yes, good point. Can we come up with 20 questions about a tomato?

I know!

Is it a fruit?

Why stop at 20?
I think we should go for
'101 questions of a tomato'.
Right, and so far we have, plus a few additions....

Is it animal?
Is it mineral?
Is it vegetable?
Is it fruit?
is it red?
is it green?
is it a tomato?
is it alive?
is it dead?
does it have seeds?
Can you cook it?
What is its name?
Does it have a birth certificate?
Can you kick it?
Does it rattle?
Can you squish it?
Does it have teeth?
is it involved in an international espanage mission?
Is it a nuclear device?
Does it have its own shoes?

does it have a green bit?

Answers:

Is it red? Whose colour chart are we using?

Is it a fruit? Depends what YOU mean by fruit sailor?

Is it mineral? Its got minerals in it.

Is it vegetable? Mostly.

Is it fruit? See above

is it red? See the above above the other above.

is it green? See the above and follow instructions from there.

is it a tomato? See post 102 preferably on this thread but you could try others Im just a quiz master not some kind of facist, despite what this hat might leadd you to think.

is it alive? Its as alive as a yoghurt.

is it dead? No.

does it have seeds? I cant see from here.

Can you cook it? Yes I can.

What is its name? Killer.

Does it have a birth certificate? No

Can you kick it? Yes I can, like my tribe that flows in layers. Makin' rhymes on the studio conveyors.

Does it rattle? No and nor does it rattle, but it does roll

Can you squish it? Yes I can.

Does it have teeth? Not yet.

is it involved in an international espanage mission? Classified.

Is it a nuclear device? Yes.

Does it have its own shoes? No all property is theft.

Does it have a green bit? See above answer regarding colour charts.

Where was it on the night in question?

How did it get here?

Has it ever been fried and if so, was it green at the time?

What is that watermelon doing there?

Has it caught up with whatever it was it was doing before?

If an east bound train is travelling at 20 kph and a monkey lets go of the tree branch at the same moment the shot is fired, then who ordered the cappellini siciliano?

Is it well red?

Is it on the vine?

And if so, Vhy doesn't it sober up?

Has it polished the silver?

When did it first begin to question its identity?

Does it wince when it hears the word 'puree'?

Could it have had a V8?

Does it realise I still have six more questions for it?

When was the last time it saw the cucumber?

Why did it cross the road?

Does it blame society for its crimes?

What does the albatross have to do with it?

Why is it called a beefsteak?

Has it ever been to Roma?

Where was it on the night in question? Over there....no not there a bit to the left...yes there.

How did it get here? It rolled from a bit to the right of where it was.

Has it ever been fried and if so, was it green at the time? Thats two questions and I only do one at a time. Its the rules.

What is that watermelon doing there? The watermelon is underage and inadmissable in evidence.

Has it caught up with whatever it was it was doing before? It wasnt doing anything and you cant prove it besides thers this other thing what you dont even know about.

If an east bound train is travelling at 20 kph and a monkey lets go of the tree branch at the same moment the shot is fired, then who ordered the cappellini siciliano? I dont know but i do remember that the air conditioner was in bay purple 37 or was it 47.

Is it well red? its well something, see above.

Is it on the vine? No.

And if so, Vhy doesn't it sober up? Its too young to drink, it hasnt even got teeth yet.

Has it polished the silver? Saucy

When did it first begin to question its identity? It has no identity.

Does it wince when it hears the word 'puree'? No

Could it have had a V8? It can do anything it sets it self to do and we should not impose roles on it.

Does it realise I still have six more questions for it? I answer the questions that why Ive got the hat.

When was the last time it saw the cucumber? We dont speak aboput that.

Why did it cross the road? Because the cucumber was coming out of the offy and we dont speak about or to the cucumber anymore than we have to.

Does it blame society for its crimes? The "crimes" are still a matter for the courts to decide.

What does the albatross have to do with it? Albert Ross was my old PE teacher.

Why is it called a beefsteak? Im blame the Brussles Buerocrats for making everything hard to spell.

Has it ever been to Roma? It has no birth certificate have you tried getting a passport without a birth certificate these days.

Is it aware of the problems it has caused over its classification?
Does it read?
Does it hop and dance and sing and shout?

Does it shake it all about?
Is it's left leg in?
its right leg out?
does it do the hokey cokey?
is that what its all about?

Is it a pineapple?
Is it the national animal for your nation?
Is it incredible?
Is it larger than a dover sole?
Does it have more spines than a peach?
Can it vote?
Does it provaracate?
Has it ever directly caused an international crisis?
Does it 'po', 'po la', 'wataaaang' frequently?

Do its ears hang low,
do they wobble to & fro?

can you tie em in a knot?
can you tie em in a bow?
do you get a funny feelin when they're hangin from the ceilin?

Is it my imagination or has this initially serious and ernest horticultural question regarding tomatoes turned . . . dare I say it? . . . somewhat SILLY???



az

Absolutely, this is far too silly, it started out as a nice thread about whether or not a tomato was a fruit or vegetable and has gone completely into something katy cornered. Stop it at once!

veeery inteeerarreeeestin....*said in russkie accent*

Ruskie....theres rusk as in the baby biscuits ad, ruskia kind of sounds like russia, she's peaking to me in a baby biscuit rusian accent...