h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

"See also la fleuve = a big river. "

Edward, old thing, are you fully qualified to perform grammatical sex changes?

Just in case, I'll continue with "le fleuve".

You know...you're damn right! They were obviously trying to confuse me by sticking an e on the end.

I remember that keys are ladies, though.

There are certain words in French that are masculine though they look feminine . . . for some reason "le silence" springs to mind . . .

marking

Edward,

"They were obviously trying to confuse me by sticking an e on the end."

"They" are even more devious than you suspected. By courtesy of Radio 4's Word of Mouth, I can reveal a plot to slim down the English language to 1,500 words. Jean-Paul Nerrière reckons that with his choice of vocabulary one could make oneself understood anywhere in the world.

The "Listen Again" button is here:
http://www.bbc.co.uk/radio4/factual/wordofmouth.shtml

In the programme the author mentions that it is not necessary to know the word "Hayfer" to make oneself understood. It wasn't until he said the substitute expression that I realised what he meant. Michael Rosen's comment and M. Nerrière's response are a joy.
If you don't get to hear the show, this bit is about 15 - 20 minutes in (I think) let me know and I'll elaborate, but I shan't be able to do justice to the exchange.

I've not read this thoroughly, but at a quick glance there's not a lot of English; certainly not 1,500 words.
http://www.jpn-globish.com/

Very interesting, plaguesville!

I was going to post on Globish in the Language and Linguistics thread! I've long been of the opinion that the rest of the world is developing a creole, loosely based on English. It takes a fair knowledge of language to work out on the fly which words you can get away with and which will not be understood.

I'm really looking forward to the software that will translate from English to Globish - eg when you type the word 'heifer', it will tell you that it won't be understood and suggest alternatives.

What I especially loved was the suggestion that Globish learners should master six Karaoke songs.

I heard someone mention the curious metaphors people use in business without considering what a non-Anglophone would understand by them: things like "Bear with me" (You've got a bear with you?)

On first reading I mistook that for Goblish. I had a bit of a when I thought it was something like klingon for the fantasy fans

Is it acceptable to start a sentence with an apostrophe?
'Cos sometimes I do and I wondered if it is acceptanble or not?
I guess, strictly speaking, it isn't since I should be using the word in full when writing, since the abbreviated form serves no purpose.

It depends entirely on what you are writing for. If you are writing for a learned journal, you shouln't use an abbreviation like 'cos. But for normal speech, of course it is acceptable.

Is there anybody here who would write 'phone, 'plane or 'cello ?

'Spose apostrophes are OK! 'S not like it's a capital offence. 'S OK by me!

Getting back to metaphors...a former colleague once attended a meeting of the International Standards Organisation on user interfaces. Near the end of the meeting, they were just drawing up a statement along the lines of 'Graphical user interfaces must be designed in accordance with sound psychological principles.' At this point the Iranian delegate leaped up and stated that he thought that *visual* principles were the most important. An uncontrollable debate broke out and it was a further three hours before they got everyone back on track.

I'd say it is acceptable. Assuming it's permissable to transcribe slang at all, then you'd need an apostrophe for 'Coz. Otherwise it's just plain wrong, surely.

Funny you should say that Gnomon, I was pondering the same thing on the 'bus yesterday!

"Is there anybody here who would write 'phone, 'plane or 'cello ?"
Not really. I might if I was responding to someone via email who had sent their email in txt speak or the like. Usually my sister who *can* type perfectly well, and probably has a better grasp of the English language than I do, but insists on sending everything in txt spk.

I've noticed that Kerr occasionally uses 'phone.

' Course, in some variants of the Lancastrian dialect, the definite article is silent and is probably best represented by an apostrophe:

Art thi goin' down to ' pub?

The 'the' isn't missing. It's still articulated, but comes out silent.

Actually, could you enlighten me as to what the apostrophe in 'cello is replacing? I'm assuming it isn't 'Limon' which is the only word I could think of ending in cello.

Cello was originally violoncello.