h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Why would you want to build a lesbian out of dry stones?

B

Artisan, thats strange. Most people say four pancakes because birds fly. But the actual answer is twenty-seven 'cause the world is round and hippos swim underwater.

Have you ever tried building a lesbian out of wet stones? dam' near impossible.

Hippos can't walk underwater, they swim overland.

Obviously, the correct answer is Wednesday.

RF

Did someone say 'hopscotch'? I don't know why we can't just do the show right here.....

Well isn't that just the same as saying, even if you have nothing you still have something. I think the answer is three times the question squared, plus barking up the left tree has not helped at all!

Spoken like a true politician - it's just : you're barking up the wrong tree

Editorial Note: This conversation has been moved from 'Ask the h2g2 Community' to 'Miscellaneous Chat'.

cool! I like your poem but i dont understand the mortar. My friend says that mortar never got bored. Ah well, errrm, the computer be shakin! aaaaaarghy! hang on, where my house!! i lost my house! miff.

I would like to annouce with pride there has been a sharp but subtle decrease in sanity withing the last 24 hours

Ah well you can lead a horse to water but a pencil must be lead.

thats because it would impune the rights of the vicar.

but vicars rights are never impuned becaus of the impuning act page 801 paragrah 6 postscript 23, stating " according to their religious and social misdemeanors in past events when their rights have been impuned, anyone who holds a post of cleric, vicar, canon or higher may not hiave his/her/its rights impuned."

This is of course precedented by the compulsary impuning of artichokes, which, under a certian pressure, and on the point where they get pinkly embarrased and can't answer simple questions such as ' how many leaves did your best friend martin-choke have when he was 3 and 4/5 of an inch tall, thereby collapsing the theory of artichoke confidance under 200 atmosheres, and rendering a change in impunation figurativly impossible.

An atttempt at a literal change however, is outlawed by the California Artichoke Advisory Board http://artichokes.org/ and is only allowed once every decade in the Castroville Artichoke Festival http://www.artichoke-festival.org/ under specified conditions and performed on an artichoke who voluntered for the task.

so generally, you cannot be correct, because nothing can impune the rights of a vicar.

As for the number of apples I reckon that this formulae is as close as you will get

(42(-67847)^(1/2)cos 56/974*Pi)/the length of a peice of string in Kelvin

dont ask to see the math

I'm confused, too many figures and political mumbo-jumbo

Ahh but the badger was dead when I did it.

poor badger

lets all go to kenya

why its warm here just now il wait till our winter than il go lolol

were can you see lions?
Only in Kenya
come to kenya weve got lions.

Were can you see tigres only in Kenya
got lions and tigres in kenya

If your not too old then you can visit Neverland There's a wide variety of animals to choose from. tigers, elephants, lions, bed-snakes.....