h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I watched a TV program today. It was entirely pointless, and the only thing I remember of it was that a rather dull middle-aged couple had their kitchen walls decorated with a series of prints illustrating novel coitus positions.

That came before I got a letter from the Conservative party, asking me to register my vote. Now, not that I am inclined to vote Conservative, but I am fundamentally under age to vote. And yet I keep getting asked to register. So, do I sit through endless helplines, etc etc and get myself off the register until I'm 18, and possibly be missed off when the time comes (though I doubt it, last year I got invited to vote in Council elections). Well that is one option. Or do I go with the flow, and vote, and see what happens? Or just do nothing?

Exactly the same thing happened to me 'lil while back (though it was Labour who wanted me to vote). I just ignored the letters, or told the people badgering me I wasn't 18 yet. They eventually went away and I certainly got all the info the next year when I was old enough.

Cheers, thanks for that.

You can always count on te government to give you excess paperwork

Oh yeah. Stack it high.

Adding extra paperword to tell you how to fill in the forms.

And a short leaflet explaining the jargon used in the paperwork.

And a covering letter

And some sponsorship.

And a reply slip (postage not included)

Reply in fluent Serbo-Croat explaning that you are merely squatting at this address, whilst seeking political asylum & enquire as to their party's views on human rights; i doubt you will be bothered again.



Terri *friend of anarchy? Moi?*

brilliant

Now to find someone who knows fluent Serbo-Croat.

*

Hmm, might have a bit of trouble there but I know a researcher who could write it in Nepoli (spl?).

This should cover most options!

http://www.tashian.com/perl/multibabel.cgi

zdt ("the landlord's best friend")

One clever site

(For those who can't be bothered clicking, it's a site which translates, then re-translates back toEnglish, like the Chinese Whispers game

Patience...
Sometimes it's fast, sometimes it's slow. Sometimes it doesn't work at all. Translations by
Concept and code by Carl
Motivated by Greg and Todd



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Original English Text:
i am an illegal immigrant who is squatting in this house. can your political party help me please?
Translated to French:
je suis un immigré illégal qui s'accroupit dans cette maison mettent
en boîte votre partie politique svp m'aident ?

Translated back to English:
I am an illegal immigrant who squats himself in this house put out of
box your part political please help me?

Translated to German:
Ich bin ein ungültiger Immigrant, der in diesem Haus sich hockt, das
aus Kasten heraus gesetzt wird, Ihrem Teil, das politisch ist mir
bitte, helfen Sie?

Translated back to English:
I am an invalid immigrant, who squats in this house, which is set
from box, your part, which is political me please, helps you?

Translated to Italian:
Sono un immigrante non valido, che accovaccia in questa casa, che è
regolata dalla scatola, la vostra parte, che è prego politica me, li
aiuto?

Translated back to English:
They are a not valid immigrant, that accovaccia in this house, that is
regulated from the box it, your part, that is prays political me, them
aid?

Translated to Portuguese:
São um immigrant inválido, esse accovaccia nesta casa, aquele são
regulados da caixa ele, sua parte, que é prays político me, eles dae
(dispositivo automático de entrada)?

Translated back to English:
Is one immigrant invalid, this accovaccia in this house, that one is
regulated of the box it, its part, that is prays politician me, they
dae (automatic device of entrance)?

Translated to Spanish:
¿Es un invalid inmigrante, este accovaccia en esta casa, que una está
regulado de la caja él, su parte, que es ruega a político yo, ellos
los dae (dispositivo automático de la entrada)?

Translated back to English:
Is invalid immigrant, this accovaccia in this house, that one is
regulated of the box he, its part, who is requests to politician I,
they them dae (automatic device of the entrance)?

Is invalid immigrant, this accovaccia in this house, that one is
regulated of the box he, its part, who is requests to politician I,
they them dae (automatic device of the entrance)?



zdt

That looks like the set of instructions I once got when I bought an electric shreader

They came in every language possible, exept English! Just as well I managed to set it up, as the pictures they used to explain the text, treated you like an idiot
Smudger.

The pictures on instruction sheets are quite funny. I love it when they need to demonstrate pressing the 'on' switch.