h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

The clockmaker's son was a prisoner of war. The camp commander wore down the prisoners' resistance by making them say "tick tock" repeatedly.

The clockmaker's son would only say "tick."

The commander threatened him: "We have ways of making you tock."

Time heals all wounds! but antiseptic creams and penicillin is a bloody lot faster

[You're twenty-eight words short, prof]

Thirty six short yourself if I count kindly. Is it all about the words or must we have a pun? would it be enough if we had only one, to say we have won? Is it just a way to have fun?

It's an experiment, so it may or may not work. There are people whose puns are hit or miss. I've added an additional layer of difficulty.

The pun part of this post is about cleaning women. If they aren't dirty, don't bother.

Soz Paul secondary modern heducatshun learn enough for your name and sod everything else

I will now un-sub mate, as to not ruin your thread(manly)