h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Chapter 21

One thing was certain: The One Tree badly needed our help, and was pulling out all the stops to get it. The houses that grew on its branches were surprisingly nice. The had water-tight roofs, spaces for windows, rudimentary furniture that the local birds had managed to construct, and even woven curtains for the window holes for privacy, courtesy of local bird species that excelled at weaving nests. For sleeping, we were provided straw pallets, complete with pillows constructed by paper wasps.

What was most surprising was the electrical outlets in the houses. Wood was not the greatest conductor of electricity, but the island's soil had affair amount of iron, which the tree arranged internally as wiring. At first, the Tree didn't know exactly what type of electrical current to provide, but eventually we got it right by trial and error. We could use adapters for our laptops and access the Internet thanks to a form of WiFi that the Tree picked up from communications satellites.

By the end of the second week on the island, the ship's hull was repaired, and all the crew members were ensconced in the houses. One day I happened to be talking to Ulysses the pastry chef, who had studied botany before going to work in his grandfather's bakery. I loaned him my headphones so he could chat with the Oracle Tree, and several issues came up that Ulysses was an expert on. "The Big Tree has tried everything under the Sun to spread its seeds beyond this island," Ulysses explained. "Its pine cones have tiny winged seeds that should theoretically travel thousands of miles on the wind, but the island is so small that not many Arborvillas can grow here. That limits the number of seeds that can be put into the atmosphere. Plus, we're so close to the Equator that the winds tend to blow up, not across the sea. This is called the doldrums, a place where wind-carried seeds don't stand much chance. "

"All I know is that coconuts float on the ocean, and sprout on any island they come to," I said, not feeling very helpful. Frankly, it was one of the few things I knew on the subject.

"The Tree has tried making seeds that mimic coconuts, but they can't get past the vortex," Ulysses said. "More recently, the Tree found out that some nut trees benefit from animals that carry their seeds away and store them underground for safekeeping. Or, birds eat the fruit from fruit trees, then the seeds pass through their digestive tracts and sprout in soil fertilized by their droppings. But squirrels don't travel on water, and the nearest land is hundreds -- even thousands -- of miles away, a long way for a bird to fly. Seagulls fly long distances, of course, but they eat fish."

"Then there's us," I said, meaning humans.

"Yes, there's us," Ulysses agreed. "The Tree is afraid of loggers and paper manufacturers and suburban developers, but it no longer has a choice. Some humans can be trusted -- Andrea Doria, for instance, and those whom she recommends. The Tree and its descendants have more to offer us than any other trees on the planet: sentience, a knack for picking up radio waves, a strong electrical field that could be used for replacing fossil fuels, and a unique ability to pick up new properties. The hope is that these talents will be so overwhelming that humans will treasure Arborvillas wherever they can be found."

"So, is it our job to carry away as many pine cones and potted saplings as we can and spread them far and wide?" I wondered.

"I think it is. The big problem is getting past that reef. If it gouges holes in our hull again, we might sink with our seeds and trees."

Just then the ground began shaking, which indicated still another big problem.

Carbon coated seeds blasted out by the volcano?

Lessons learned from the eruption at Pompeii: 1. Get out as soon as you hear the initial tremors. Once the lava starts flowing, you're dead. The only people who escaped from Pompeii were the ones who had horses and who left soon. Modern cars might be able to outrun the lava, but not if they get stuck In a traffic jam.

I hope that Arbovilla trees will be able to leave the island.

[Amy P]

Once the volcano blows, they will leave the island for sure, though not intact.

Personally, I am hoping they can figure out how to use the wormhole to save the 'old one', but don't let me influence your muse

F S

I was hoping to be able to do just that, Florida Sailor, but plant can propagated without seeds: just break off a branch and plant it, and it may well come up as a new plant. If the volcano blows the big tree apart, and the winds carry the fragments around the world, chances are at least some of them will lodge somewhere and grow.

Have you ever read the novel 'The Moon is a Harsh Mistress' by Robert A. Heinlein?

I only ask because there are some very interesting parallels to your story, although he writes about a sentient computer.

If you have not, let me recommend it as something you will enjoy.



F S

I'm just reminded of the song

"I don't know, I don't know

I don't know where I'm gonna go, when the volcano blows"

"Have you ever read the novel 'The Moon is a Harsh Mistress' by Robert A. Heinlein?" [Florida Sailor]

I have a *lot* of catching up to do with genre fiction. I have lists of great crime novels, and recent [21st century] award-winning novels in detective and science fiction categories, as well as great children's books of all time, but I have neglected earlier science fiction.

I will rectify this as soon as I can. I've only read [or seen movie adaptations of] 18 of the 100 great science fiction novels on one list. So much to read, so little time.

The only 21st Century SF I've read are "Darwin's Radio" and "Blackout" and "Jonathan Strange and Mr. Norrell."