This is the Message Centre for Shea the Sarcastic

The Dreaded Yard Sale

Post 1

Shea the Sarcastic


We finally had our long-awaited yard sale this past weekend. Among the top 10 worst decisions I've ever made in my life, this was about #3. smiley - tongueout

I had two unexpected guests this weekend. My friend and her sister were on the island to visit their brother who was in the hospital. Luckily, they stayed around that morning to help us set up. I don't know what we would have done without them! Half of the stuff we were selling was from this friend's mother-in-law. She went into an assisted-living facility last year, and we were hoping to raise some money to pay for her stay. The facility doesn't accept Medicare, so once her money runs out, she has to leave. She's on the waiting list for another facility closer to where my friend lives, but in the meantime we've all got our fingers crossed that she can stay where she is until then.

All week they said that the weather would be nice on Doobry. We got up at 6am, an hour and a half after we normally go to bed smiley - sleepy, and it was raining. We looked at the radar on TV, and it looked like we'd get a break in the rain. They kept saying the the next day would be terrible weather-wise, so we were going to try to squeeze it in while we could. The rain finally stopped at 7:50am, 10 minutes before the advertised starting time. Of course, about 15 people showed up just as we begin taking things out of the garage to set up. What is with people and garage sales anyway? These people were crazed! We were trying to keep them out of the garage, and they were very annoyed that we weren't set up yet. We had originally planned to put things on the lawn, but it was too wet, so we just set up as much as we could on the driveway ... especially since it looked like more rain. TJ had a tarp (and a much smaller piece of plastic than he originally thought), so we tried to keep things close together so we could cover them up if it rained.

An hour into the sale, the rain started again. TJ suddenly remembered where the other plastic was, so we scrambled to cover everything. It stopped 15 minutes later, and we uncovered. It did this again about 15 minutes after that. My helpers left then to take showers so they could leave. We were okay until about 10:45am when the heavens opened. It was absolutely pouring! We got everything covered again, but the plastic kept blowing, so TJ stayed by the front door keeping an eye on it. My sister arrived just as my friends left. I decided to have some lunch, and my sister and I got to visit for a few minutes. TJ then exclaimed that somebody was actually getting out of their car to come and look at the stuff. What were they going to do? Crawl under the tarp? smiley - rolleyes

The rain stopped about an hour later, and stayed away for the rest of the afternoon. This whole sale was so much work! Just terrible! We did get to meet quite a few neighbors, however (we've lived here for 4 1/2 years, so it was nice to finally know there were others living in the neighborhood smiley - tongueout).

Our worst customer was this old man that rifled through our "free" box, and spent the next 10 minutes throwing horrible pun-ish riddles at us (example: "What do they serve at the insane asylum?" "Soup to nuts!"). I had no sleep at all the night before, and was lucky to be upright with my eyes half open. When we didn't answer his awful riddles, he started making comments like, "I should give out smart pills here!" and "What's this? The insane asylum?" He finally bought $1 worth of junk and left. He's lucky I didn't slug him. smiley - cross And people trying to bargain an item that's labeled 25¢ down to 10¢. We don't have anything smaller than a quarter. Live big, ya cheapo! smiley - cross

We sold about half of the junk (we were able to write a check to my friend for $200, which should let her mother-in-law stay in her current rest facility for about an afternoon smiley - tongueout). TJ looked at the stuff that was left and said, "We should do this again tomorrow so we can sell the rest." I let him know that if he was going to do that, it wouldn't be "we" doing it. Then he said maybe next weekend. I reminded him that Gosho was coming next weekend, but he seemed to really want to do it ... that is, until it took 45 minutes just to put what was left back into the garage. After that, he said, "Never again!" My answer was, "YAY!!!™" The rest of the stuff goes to charity.

Needless to say, I slept 13 hours that night, and woke the next day with one of the worst migraines I've ever had. TJ is now home sick with a terrible head cold, but it's over! Over! smiley - diva


The Dreaded Yard Sale

Post 2

Avenging Washcloth, An unhurried sense of time is, in itself, a form of wealth.

"Live big, ya cheapo! smiley - cross"


smiley - laughsmiley - roflsmiley - laugh


We had a garage sale *ONCE* years and years ago. Like youse guys, we learned from that experience. We had rain too. smiley - groan


The Dreaded Yard Sale

Post 3

Shea the Sarcastic

We tried to have it twice last autumn, and got rain both times. smiley - wah

Here's something I don't understand: at least 5 people that came to our garage sale said that they were going to have a garage sale that day too, but cancelled it because of the rain. So you go to garage sales when your garage sale is rained out? smiley - headhurts


The Dreaded Yard Sale

Post 4

Avenging Washcloth, An unhurried sense of time is, in itself, a form of wealth.

You get migraines too?!! smiley - yikes

smiley - cuddlesmiley - towel

I've suffered with those all my life.... must be an smiley - artist kind of thing. smiley - tongueout


The Dreaded Yard Sale

Post 5

Avenging Washcloth, An unhurried sense of time is, in itself, a form of wealth.

"So you go to garage sales when your garage sale is rained out? "

No, you go to garage sales when your garage has washed away to buy a new garage.

Go ahead, slug me. smiley - tongueout


The Dreaded Yard Sale

Post 6

Shea the Sarcastic

smiley - wizard Okay, you're a slug!

I had two migraines this past week! One was hormonal, the other was stress-induced. Aren't brains wonderful?


The Dreaded Yard Sale

Post 7

Galaxy Babe - eclectic editor

Remind me never to have a yard sale (whatever one of those is)smiley - tongueout

There's an old Yorkshire saying "There's nowt so queer as folk" and it's very true. People will travel miles in search of a bargain, plus there's the antique-hunters (the Roadshow last weekend showed a woman who had paid 50p for a "cute" thimble-holder from a charity shop - it was actually a Faberge shot glass made especially for the Russian Imperial Royal Family and was worth £20,000) *gasp*

This is why people like to get there early, to glean the wheat from the chaff. And probably explains why they're annoyed when the rubbish box contains...rubbishsmiley - silly

smiley - goodluckwith the weather next timesmiley - runsmiley - flansmiley - run


The Dreaded Yard Sale

Post 8

pheloxi | is it time to wear a hat? |

sounds like weather form of Murphy's law....

over here not many hohd garage sales. overhere some one rent an old grain market building and people who want sell things rent a tables. the person who rents an old grain market building advertises in local papers and rillboards around town.


The Dreaded Yard Sale

Post 9

There is only one thing worse than being Gosho, and that is not being Gosho

BV had a yard sale a few years ago after her mother died - pretty near emptied the entire house, sold her car too (and kept her mother's very nice Toyota Corolla). She made a *lot* of money. Thankfully... er, I mean sadly I couldn't help out - I had to go to work.

Oh dear how sad never mind smiley - tongueout

I'm rather glad you won't be doing it again next weekend smiley - winkeye


The Dreaded Yard Sale

Post 10

paulh, vaccinated against the Omigod Variant

I love your latest name, Gosho. You may be a very naughty Gosho, but that's just more reason to love yousmiley - smiley.

Shea, what would you do if I said it was *I* who sent the awful punster to your garage sale smiley - tongueout. No, it's not true, but I'm enjoying the mental image that my mind conjures upsmiley - biggrin. Another good insane asylum joke is this:

A feel-good self-help guru went to a mental hospital to help cheer up the patients. After being introduced, he started by saying, "Now, do we know why we're all here?" A voice piped up from the back of the room: "Because we're not all there."

Shea, dear, now that you know there's an unsuccessful comedian in your neighborhood, does that make you feel better about moving far away?smiley - bigeyes


The Dreaded Yard Sale

Post 11

Shea the Sarcastic

smiley - laugh You've got a point there, Paul! smiley - laugh

GB, a Yard Sale is what you have when your garage isn't big enough for a Garage Sale! smiley - winkeye I also see signs around the neighborhood for Moving Sale, Tag Sale, you name it!

Apparently, costume jewelry is the big seller around here. My friend told me as much after her yard sale, and I had lots of people ask for it. I decided to hold onto my costume jewelry and try eBay. I'm sure I'll get more money. smiley - thief

pheloxi, we have the same sorts of sales here, they're called Flea Markets. I didn't have enough fleas to justify going. smiley - tongueout

I don't know, Gosho ... we've still got a garage full of stuff. Make sure you sedate TJ! smiley - winkeye


The Dreaded Yard Sale

Post 12

parrferris

I don't think we have Yard Sales or Garage Sales here, Shea. What we do have are Car Boot Sales, where people load all their stuff into the back of their car at the crack of dawn on a Dontbry morning, then drive to a field somewhere (usually just outside the town) where you sell your junk from a trestle table behind your vehicle alongside hundreds of similarly-minded people. The trouble with being a vendor at these events is that you will, no doubt, sell lots of your own unwanted bric-a-brac, but you will probably end up buying at least as much of other people's.


The Dreaded Yard Sale

Post 13

paulh, vaccinated against the Omigod Variant

Sounds like a good way to keep the economy goingsmiley - ok.


The Dreaded Yard Sale

Post 14

Avenging Washcloth, An unhurried sense of time is, in itself, a form of wealth.

We have something like Car Boot Sales here in the US... but we call it eBay. smiley - tongueout


The Dreaded Yard Sale

Post 15

parrferris

Not as much fun as standing in a muddy field at cock-crow on a cold, damp morning...


The Dreaded Yard Sale

Post 16

paulh, vaccinated against the Omigod Variant

Well, not much is *that* much fun, or everybody would be doing itsmiley - tongueout.


The Dreaded Yard Sale

Post 17

Shea the Sarcastic

This is true! I don't think I could stand that much fun ... ever!


The Dreaded Yard Sale

Post 18

Avenging Washcloth, An unhurried sense of time is, in itself, a form of wealth.

Might be more fun if y'all had "Nudist Car Boot Sales" and rolled around in the mud....


..... as weather permits, of course. smiley - blush


The Dreaded Yard Sale

Post 19

Shea the Sarcastic

Yeah, no fun having nude mud boot sales if it's too dry. smiley - tongueout


The Dreaded Yard Sale

Post 20

Avenging Washcloth, An unhurried sense of time is, in itself, a form of wealth.

Yeah, it's futile to make "mud angels" in those conditions.... much less spot the snakes.

smiley - tongueout


Key: Complain about this post

More Conversations for Shea the Sarcastic

Write an Entry

"The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy is a wholly remarkable book. It has been compiled and recompiled many times and under many different editorships. It contains contributions from countless numbers of travellers and researchers."

Write an entry
Read more