h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Y'know, I do believe that's one of the recipes I've already considered

Not a food-related 'Okay chaps...' this time, an IT-related one.

I got a new laptop delivered yesterday. Today's my day off so I'm going to fire it up for the first time and start transferring files. Thing is, I'm used to having no bloatware on both my current computers. I built the desktop myself so it has nothing but the operating system on it, plus whatever programmes I've chosen to install. The laptop came with Vista but I upgraded it to Windows 7, which wiped out all the factory-installed bloatware, although I still get the maker's splash screen at boot up.

So today I'm going to spend time uninstalling a whole load of crap I don't want and will never use.

Oh, and I managed to palm the old laptop off to a friend at work in exchange for a couple of bottles of Bear Republic Big Bear Black

Isn't that the traditional first job when buying a new PC? Clearing off all the unwanted software and installing lean, low-footprint alternatives?

B

It is for me.

Well that's really annoying. The machine doesn't come with a restore disc - you have to make one yourself

1. It requires three blank DVDs. I don't have DVDs. Who on earth burns anything to DVD these days? All my stuff is on hard drive. One 2TB HD takes up a fraction of the space you'd need if you burned everything on it to DVDs. And now you can get 3TB drives. Takes up exactly the same amount of space as a 2TB drive. Or a 6GB drive. And if I need to transfer something from one PC to a PC in another location, that's what 32GB thumb drives are for.

2. You have to create the restore disc before you make any changes to the computer. Too late. And they don't tell you that until a popup notification shows itself in the bottom right hand corner after you've already started using the computer.

Ah well, I'll just get meself an upgrade anyway. I don't care for restore discs. I want to be able to reinstall the OS without having to spend another hour uninstalling all the crap I just uninstalled. Just have to hope I don't have to reinstall before then. OEM operating systems are cheap enough. Linux operating systems are free.

As long as you keep all your personal files backed up. If I have a crash, I just consider it a damn fine time to upgrade, not restore.

Hey Gosho! I've got a load of green tomatoes I got from the garden this weekend. As soon as I can translate that recipe you gave me the link to, I'll try making the chutney.

Ooh, that reminds me, I need to make some more too before tomatilloes go out of season. Do tomatilloes go out of season? I've no idea Pretty much nothing seems to go out of season these days. My local supermarket had sprouts all through the summer

You watch yourself. Thems might be foreign sprouts!

Yeah, Brussels sprouts, from...

Belgium!

Why didn't the filter blank out the worst word in the universe?

If the Belgians really had anything to do with Brussels Sprouts I'm quite prepared to forgive them anything. I'm glad to say that they're still pretty seasonal in the shops here, although I could happily eat them all year round (and I'm not exactly known for my fondness for green vegetables).

I heard somewhere a week or two back that Belgium has the only economy in Europe showing a healthy level of growth; Belgium hasn't had a government to speak of for well over a year. Draw your own conclusions...

Apologies for the language, especially in such refined company.

It's because of all that fantastic Belgian beer Well, I've been buying the hell out of it so have our customers

Good grief - your beer drinking is what's fuelling the entire Belgian economy? You must have been really thirsty...

Well, not the *entire* economy of Belgium (pardon my French), just one small, insignificant bit But one has to do what one has to do.

Bara Brith

Now, I have made Bara Brith before. In fact, I've got at least four recipes for it in the tea breads and buns section of my recipes folder on this machine. Some use yeast, some don't. Some say soak the fruit in tea first, some don't. Some require the tea to be hot, some cold.

This one didn't come out right. I think I know why - I changed recipes in mid stream. The one I started using called for tea-soaked fruit, as did the one I switched to, but the first was with self-raising flour whereas the second was a yeast recipe.

I soaked the fruit overnight and started work on putting it all together this morning. As I read through the method for the recipe I started with I realised that it was utterly vague and not exactly workable. There were missing instructions. So I picked on another recipe I also hadn't tried before and put some yeast out to bloom. Long story short, it rose as it should during proving, I put it in the oven for the required baking time, took it out... and it had collapsed.

I'm not sure what happened but it tastes bloody delicious. I've only cut the crust off one end so far so it might turn out to be virtually uncooked dough in the middle. It's very, very moist. Rest assured, I'm going to eat as much of the bloody thing as I can

I'm going to slow roast a shoulder of pork overnight. I made a rub of various seeds and spices (no, I can't remember exactly what - I opened packets and spooned some of the contents into my grinder) with some olive oil, and that's been sitting on the meat for a few hours.

I'm going to put it in my big Dutch oven, give it a blast for about 20 minutes at high temp and then turn the oven down to about 200F and leave it in there while I get my beauty sleep.

And I'm definitely going to do this again on the three or four really cold nights that Austin gets during the winter

I went straight to the even this morning, took the meat out, slid the thermometer probe in (and it went in like I was putting it into warm butter) and got a reading of 161F. A little higher than I wanted (145 is considered safe for pork), but I think it's going to be pretty tasty

And yes, I did remember to switch the oven off... I think

Chocolate Banana Bread

This one turned out so good I feel a need to share. I ended up using baking chocolate because I thought I had some chocolate chips, and then found out I didn't, but I had some chocolate left over from something else. It turned out okay.

Ingredients
250g/8oz plain flour
2 tsp baking powder
125g/4oz unsalted butter, softened
250g/8oz caster sugar
4 ripe bananas, mashed
2 eggs, lightly beaten
1 tsp vanilla extract
175g/6oz good quality dark or milk chocolate chips

Method
Preheat the oven to 180C/350F/Gas4. Sift the flour and baking powder into a large bowl.

Mix the butter, sugar, banana, eggs, vanilla extract and chocolate chips in a separate bowl. Add to the dry ingredients and stir to combine, being careful not to over-mix.

Pour the batter into a non-stick, or lightly greased and floured, 19cm x 11cm loaf tin and bake for 1 hour 15 minutes, or until a skewer inserted into the centre of the loaf comes out clean.

Leave to stand in the tin for 5 minutes before turning out on to a wire rack to cool. Serve in thick slices with butter.

I need more pudding basins!

I made a steak and kidney pudding this afternoon but I only had one basin left in the cupboard and that one was too small. I still used it but I ended up with a bunch of filling left over. I do have a basin big enough but it's got a in it I even thought about putting it one of my rectangular Pyrex dishes but I wouldn't have any way of steaming something that shape.