h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Entry: How to avoid people you don't like - A17147847
Author: smith-ee - U6458008

my first effort - be gentle

How very apt at the moment..

Brilliant. A couple of PTAs you have omitted: neighbours and fellow researchers

Oh, and what if you are the parent with a child PTA?


W

I enjoyed reading that.

Hmmm, how about PTAs at school? That would be a tricky one.

Also, you need a space after the colon for Step 3.

One of the most disturbing entries I've read in a long time.

You've chosen to write this as a 100% humourous piece. To be honest, the "practical advice" is pretty obvious, and only serves to support the humour. We do have other entries in this vein, though, so it may have a place in the EG.

What I found disturbing was that it gets inside the mind of someone with a bit of a complex. Some people would ask "why do you have to take steps to avoid these people?" "Why don't you go where you want to and make them avoid you?"

If I was writing it, I might research some self-help techniques and resources. There may be many people in this situation who would rather they were not.

One phrase I didn't understand:
You lost me - how did your clothes get dirty?

Icy

If your initial attemps at avoidance are useless, do not be discourage
=
If your initial attemps at avoidance are useless, do not be discouraged

clothes often get dirty due to normal, everyday wear, but i will attempt to clarify

well spotted

will try neighbours.

i'd like to think parents actually like their children so may not need or want to avoid them, but i'll think of something

http://www.bbc.co.uk/dna/h2g2/alabaster/F5888408?thread=3658892 Found that at the bottom. Don't know if you saw it. For me, the toughest part were the looong paragraphs. Is there any way to break them down a bit?

Make it a bit more scientific, why would i want to avoid someone? What's the phsycology behind it all?

Hi there, Smith-ee:

You are off to a stellar start! If you're of a mind, there are a few things I might have expected to see that don't seem to be included. They are alluded to when you discuss the 'in the store' occasion. I'm speaking of specific tactics when a run-in seems imminent.

You could call the section tactics, or have a tactics section under different other headings; things like ducking in doorways or down manholes, popping over to a telephone and appearing to be in a whispered, but intense, argument with whoever you are pretending is on the other line (sometimes if you can't actually 'avoid', you can deter), under the desk might work in some jobs (in fact, boss avoidance would make a good section). I'm sure you get the idea.

Good luck with it!

PS: If you decide it needs a LOT more work, the appropriate thing to do is remove it, temporarily, from Peer Review and polish it up. Works in progress are best kept in one's personal space or a writing workshop space. Still, I'm glad you presented it and got some (hopefully useful) feedback.

Peer Review is for finished pieces that just need a bit of comment and tweaking and error-checking. If you feel that this is the case, then leave it here of course.

"... and should be avoided at all costs."

It's up to the person concerned to decide what cost is worthwhile to avoid meeting certain people. It's worth going the long way around to the supermarket, but it's not worth moving house. Or something. Each avoider must make individual decisions for each avoidee. Rarely is "at all costs" the decision made.



Can one stay out all night only at "pubs and clubs"? What about a party at someone's house? Or even a small mini-party, just a bunch of friends sitting around chatting till the small hours? Or go for a very long walk in the woods in the dark with a couple of sensible mates (my option: advisable only if you're already familiar with the woods in daylight)? Or lots of other things?



"making your wayt to the cupboard"

A stray /t/ there.



Avoiding people at work

This section could do with some additions. What about people who work on building sites, for example? Can you always ask a different carpenter to give you a hand? Tricky.



"to reduce the amount of trips to the bar"

The number of trips. You have amounts only of non-count nouns.



You might also mention that being caught skulking is likely to be far more embarrasing than a direct meeting. You should judge your skill at skulking and the chances of getting caught, and then do a risk/benefit analysis over the three options outlined.

TRiG.

I like this it's a very good subject, I'm loathe to ask, but.....is there a way to avoid people you don't like online.

FordsTowel has some good points. You want to be scientific about it. Not to plug or anything (well maybe a little), but consider getting very technical about it, like here: A16303808

Thank you, Leo.

And, by scientific I assume you mean organize the information somewhat more categorically.

Yes. Right now, it reads rushed. Like the information has to go in, but a vast amount needs to fit under the small headers. So it's being stuffed in.



If it's reorganized into sub-categories, Smith-ee can slow down and give each technique the time and attention it deserves. It'll be funnier too.


Am I right?

I should think so, Leo. Let us see if Smith-ee agrees!

This is a nice article, I like it, it has a lot of potential. There are a couple of tyops in it I'm not going to list them because that's annoying and I might end up on your list.

I like the bit in the first paragraph which says if you have too many people on your list you should stay indoors, that made me giggle. You should include a warning that making a written list may be problematic if one of the people on it finds it and it has "People I Don't Like" written at the top in red and double underlined.

I would say that for someone living at home and old enough to move out; staying out all night is their second best option apart from putting them in a public place and increasing their chances of meeting someone else they don't like, their best option is to get a job - preferably one where they can work alone, like being a gardener, plumber or ideally a light-house keeper.

You may like to include a short list of solitary jobs in the section about work (see above). I also find it is good to have one of those little mirrors at the top of your monitor and to keep the area under your desk clear of clutter - this way if someone you don't like tries to sneak up on you, you will most likely spot them and have an escape route providing your desk is not in a corner.

I also think that public places can be the easiest places to avoid people; there are usually several exits, in a crowded place it is easier to slip away or blend in, in darkness it is easy to hide in the shadows, for woods and parks - anyone with more than five people on their list should wear camouflage.

It would also be valuable to cover what someone should do if they have a group of friends that they hang out with which includes someone they don't like or if they don't like their next-door neighbour. Thaose can be very socially challenging situations I can tell you!

Good luck!

Well I'm too lazy to look for errors and stuff at the moment, and also I should be out doing real work, rather than messing around online.

However;

- You alluded to listening to music in your section on the supermarket. A good trick can be to have a set of headphones in your ears at all times, enabling you to pretend you are listening to music and ignore people. Alternatively you can use a mobile phone as an avoidance tactic, waving to the PTA, gesture that you are on your phone and imply that you will talk to them later, when hell has frozen over.

- Other, simillar entries include A13930805 (which is rubbish but it got through the net anyway, somehow) and A14310569, both of which skirt between treating a slightly frivilous idea as if it was very serious and offering some (hopefully) useful advice to people who treat a slightly frivilous idea very seriously.

Hope that helps.