h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

If you'd like to read the Principia Discordia without the bother of killing trees, it's available in numerous spots on the web, including http://www.cs.cmu.edu/~tilt/principia/body.html .

My favorite line comes from the 5th Edition Introduction:

"Mike Gunderloy was just a compulsive reader of fanzines until the fateful day he read Principia Discordia (under the mistaken impression it was another fanzine). Now he is Ukelele the Short of the Discordian Society and big-time publisher of Factsheet Five."

Of course, I'm prejudiced.

As are we all.

Hail Eris!

(Good Entry, by the way. I saw it on the front page and clicked with some trepidation, having seem some dingo's livers masquerading as explanations in the past, but you're dead on. Except for that stuff about haiku, of course. I may have to excommunicate you over that.)

-- Ukelele the Short, K.S.C.

ffmike,

Is there anywher on the web that you haven't already been?

Or is there some discordian principle that says you can be everywhere at once? Something to do with being Pope I imagine.

Well, with upwards of a billion pages out there, there must be a few I haven't visited yet. But I'm pretty good at finding things. Sometimes I think there's a business here waiting to happen...web guide or somesuch.

As for being Pope, you're one too. All you need to do is pick a papal name. (I am, for instance, Pope Sicle I, when I am acting in my papal role).

Pope Stragbasher?

The Pope Who Can?

Pope Pompous III?

Pope Procrastes?

Pope R E?

Pope Capitulant? Oh, I like that one. With a number.

"Pope Capitulant III, leader of the Wholly Roaming Churches of Id."

Thanks, Mike

See, now you're an ordained Pope...along with every other man, woman, child, and dog on the planet. Let's see, I believe the chain of ordination for you runs to me, to Arthur Hlavaty, to Robert Anton Wilson, to Kerry Thornley hissownself. Though these things are so entangled that I'm probably wrong about it. Anyhow, go forth and excommunicate or something.

If you get 23 minutes, check out http://www.h2g2.com/A262739

FYI; the september 98 issue of the conservative american publication The Economist reported that the nerve-gassing of a Tokyo subway was carried out by a radical organization with billions of dollars in assets whose stated aim was 'to strike at the key figures of a multinational conspiracy' whose control of banks, insurance agencies and politicians worldwide were part of a plan for evolutionary apotheosis of the human species. It seems like a rather ludicrous idea, almost as ludicrous as the concept of spending billions of dollars on counter-terrorist attacks against such a group.

Greetings, all --

How about Pope Yoolarity the Most Reknowned?

(Dibs on that one! )

--Chameleon

Sounds good to me. Go preach a crusade or something

Accordianism; the self-authenticating belief that all belief is believable. Accordians proseletyze by entering into a discussion with someone and then loudly, vehemently, and emphatically affirming their agreement with every statement uttered. When not directly responding in this manner to an assertation, accordians are encouraged to say affirming things like 'nice hat you have there' or 'gosh, you've lost weight'. Not to be confused with worship of polish music.

Trees are evil! Save dirt, kill a tree.

Absolutely. Burn 'em to make electricity for computers, I say.

By the way, have you lost weight too?

Nah, doesn't work for me.

Take that stupid hat off, you fat git!

Side benefit: if we burn all the trees there will be room to add more lanes to the freeways and so cut down on traffic congestion.

I agree. It also means people are safe from the threat of a tree blocking the path they want to drive through, a major example of coniferous homicide. I also hate mowing lawns. Can we get rid of grass too?

By the way mike I read your page and liked it. I'm gonna put a link to it from mine sometime if that's cool. Visit mine sometime if you want.

This is the Internet; you don't have to ask before linking (contrary to the legal theories of some large and misguided corporations). I've already wandered by your home page & I'll probably touch base there again.

I read somewhere (many somewheres) that the logging industries of the USA, Australia, and other countries always leave a band of trees along the side of any roads that happen to run through the forests they're cutting down.

The reason given is that they don't want the environmentalists to notice what's going on, but the truth is that they're just saving the land for future freeway expansion by preventing people from building houses there.

See? Proof that unfettered capitalism works in the best interests of society.

The best way to kill grass is to tarmac over it, and this has the added advantage of making more space for parking cars. I have ventured the opinion elsewhere that it would be a good idea to turn Wales into a car park for people visiting Birmingham.

I believe it was Mr. Montgomery Burns who said something to the effect that 'mother nature started this war for survival, and now that we're finally winning she's cowering in fear screaming 'please no don't finish me I surrender!' Well, we'll show her no more pity than she showed us.'

Pretty reasonable Western perspective. Let's hope we don't catch onto the fact that we ARE a vital manifestation of nature before I manage to find a parking spot. When my descendants are living in a cave in an iceberg 500 years from now I want them to remember my life counted for something.

What do you mean 'the bit about Haikus?' You should see the number of Discordian Haiku sites out there. I thought about making a gratuitous Black Adder reference and writing, "It's all done with Haiku these days. It used to be black and white line drawings, but the Haiku are ever so much more effective."

This excommunication thing however is new... It reminds me of a friend who founded a church based on _Stranger_In_A_Strange_Land_ but couldn't come to terms with Real People in his church and had to introduce the concept of excommunication for his Waterbrothers.

But overall, I am tickled pink at the response I've received. Thank you all.

Rev. 'id' H.M., S.H.

Anyone here know anything about the Apocrypha Discordia, Steve Jackson Games as yet non-existent sequel to the Principia Discordia? I've collected some of the writings by Reverend Loveshade at http://www.geocities.com/bloodstar84/pd_links.html. Anyone have any more?

Sorry, this hitchhiker's site tried to link to the page by including the period at the end. Here it is without that debilitating period: http://www.geocities.com/bloodstar84/pd_links.html If this doesn't work just go to http://www.geocities.com/bloodstar84 and look for it in the spirit of chaos for which the Principia was penned. Thank you Hail Eris and have a day.