h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

The eating methods described (and when presented with a bourbon I think there are few people who would not try to eat a bourbon sequentially) drew an obvious parallel with the bourbon's spiritual sister the wondrous Jaffa Cake. If you are the sort of person who derives extra pleasure from eating a biscuit a section at a time, then the challenge of consuming a cake-based flavourfest chocolate first, then sponge and finally to be left with just the 'smashing orangey bit' is surely irresistible.

I used to consume Jaffa Cakes in said style. It eventually reached a head when I received, for my 18th birthday, a box of Jaffa Cakes, containing nothing but the smashing Jaffa orangey bit. Apparently it took my friend more than two hours to (hygenically) part the SJOB from the sponge and chocolate, and then wrap each piece in tinfoil. We decided at that point to stop being silly and go and become students instead. Ah

I used to eat Twixes by biting the biscuit bit at the bottom first, which left just the caramel and chocolate bit off the top.

My own variation on Jaffa cake ritual is to eat the cakey bit first, then fold the remaining chocolate-coated orangey bit in half and devour that too.

Speaking of which, are the currently available totally-coated-in-chocolate Jaffa cakes the true apotheosis of biscuitry or what?

Did anybody used to break Ginger Nuts on their elbows? You got a wish if it split into four bits I think.

This sounds very odd. How was the manoeuvre accomplished? Do you put a ginger nut on your elbow and bang it on something, or put the ginger nut on the table and bang it with your elbow...?

1) Roll up sleave to above elbow (you don't want crumbs up your jumper for the rest of the day).
2) Hold Ginger Nut, face up, in your hand.
3) Strike Ginger Nut with elbow.
4) Examine number of bits and (if appropriate) make a wish. You must not say anything during this time, or you lose the wish.
5) Eat Ginger Nut
Simple, but definately a bit strange.

So does it work with other biscuits, or are only Ginger Nuts mystically endowed?

Biscuitry, Or rather Cakeistry, or erm... Jaffistry?

I never heard of it with any other biscuit. Presumably it would make a mess with a Jammy Dodger or Custard Cream. And as for a Jaffa Cake, you would just smear it all over your elbow. Never get a wish out of that.

The craft of making biscuits is called buiscuitmanship, or possibly cakemanry or jaffamanship.

But in theory it would be possible with a Digestive or Rich Tea, surely.

A propos, does anyone else think Rich Tea biscuits should be renamed Really Poor Tea?

Rich Tea are not hard enough, especially after you have dunked them.



I think Really Poor Tea is a touch harsh. Thrifty Tea perhaps, or Affordable by Gran Tea?

It's not their low cost I'm referring to really, it's their general unexcitingness. Fan of biscuits though I am, if "Rich" teas are all that's on off I'd rather chew a bit of cardboard.

Then again, I'm not a dunker, so perhaps I am missing something...

I must admit, they are not top of my biscuity pops either.

The only bad thing about Jaffa Cakes is that they are so gourgeous that they get eaten far too quickly. For example I had a whole Jaffa Cakes tube in about 15mins this morning whilst working. Being a student I can't afford to get through them THAT quickly

i too similarly consume jaffa cakes rather rapidly. recently we have begun to take them to our astronomy lessons (well after all there is a precident)

the only problem i have with jaffa cakes is you cannot dunk them, i am a dunker (even with rich teas, which by the way are made palettable by metled chocolate) and this upsets me somewhat as i am faced with the troublesome descision not only between tea, coffee, hot chocolate etc but also between drink, jaffa, or diffrent biscuit.

this being altogether too brain consuming i have generally made a cup of coffee to help me think before i have made a descision thus rendering me unable to eat my jaffa cakes (even without dunking the combination of orange and coffee is not particularly nice)

maybe it woud be altogether easier to eat cake?