h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Can anyone think of any more?

I was just wondering what happened to Danny Invincible...

Marc Anthony of Berwick Rangers was another favourite of mine - always tried to sign him on Champo... and Jan Vennegoor of Hesselink, come to think of it.

Danny Invincibile is playing for Kilmarnock I think.

I've always thought that Fabien Cool was a good name for a footballer

I used to find it amusing on Championship Manager when the board suggested I should buy a "big-name player"... I always went for Vennegoor of Hesselink - can't get a bigger name than that...

Stern John is a particularly fine name, I always think.

Did you know that 'Vennegoor of Hesselink' translates as 'Vennegoor OR Hesselink'? It seems that Dutch tradition once said that when couples married, they took the surname of the family with the higher social status. But before one wedding a long time ago, the Vennegoors and Hesselinks couldn't agree about which tribe was higher placed - hence the fact that Jan has so much trouble fitting his name across his shoulders!

Southport used to have a winger called Dwayne Plummer.

B

Yeah Invincable still at Killie makes good headlines excepts when he scores against you.

Paul DICKOV

Celtic had a player called Rafael Scheidt a few years back, whatever happened to him...

He went back to Brazil first with Corinthians then on to Athletico before ending up at Botafogo

http://www.sambafoot.com/en/players/608_Scheidt.html

I always when i hear the name Bruce Grobbelar for some reason.

I always thought it was such a shame Kenny Lunt wasn't christened by the Reverend Dr Spooner.

I like Lancaster's Ryan-Zico Black. His double barelled first name came about becuase his father wanted to call him Zico, but his mother insisted on Ryan as a "proper Irish name". Mr Black then goes to register the birth and puts the hyphen in, to make a point.

And he's now known to friends (and fans) merely as Zico. Proper Irish name by the wayside.

He also represented Guernsey in the Island games and appeared on Grandstand looking grumpy after losing the final.

There are some great names in non-league... Aylesbury legend Cliff Hercules is one of my all-time favourites.

There was a time when I used to have an XI of silly non-league names uppermost in my mind, but sadly apart from Cliff and former Walsall trainee Barry Rumble (who doesn't even show up on Google) I can't remember any of the others.

Ah, they're coming back now. Joff Vansittart, anyone? Jimmy Dack?

(there was a brief period when we used him as an expression of mild annoyance, a bit like bloody hell or Gordon Bennett)

Go on, try saying it out loud.

Paul Dick
Alessandro D`Allesandro

When Rafael Scheidt played for Celtic, so did Oliver Tebily. Rumour had they tried to sign David Weir from Everton around the same time.

Giving a back three of Weir, Tebily, Scheidt.

Heh Heh.

Lancaster's captain is called Neil Uberschar, but spellcheck in Word insists he's called Neil Superstar. And the teamsheet against Leigh RMI away called him Neil Ubschyer (As did the announcer, who sounded like a 12-year-old boy).

Uberschar is from Morecambe. And Everton's Dax Hoogerwerf is from Blackpool. Does anyone in Lancashire not have Dutch names?

Dax Hoogerwerf?

That's the best name I've heard, ever!

And he's from Blackpool!

http://www.evertonfc.com/match/squad.html?player_id=91

Dax Hoogerwerf is a very Douglas Adams sort of name, don't you think? Sounds like an old drinking buddy of Zaphod Beeblebrox!

Another favourite of mine: Jermaine McSporran of Chester City.