h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I confess. I did wrong, by assuming that members of this community were "normal". I did doubly wrong by not being a member of this church, too, I was told by one who is more enlightened than myself. There is no health in me; I have a heavy load on my soul.
But can I join???
*looks hopeful*
Joanna

While your absence has pained us, we are now in your light. You are most welcome into our fold. How does your title "Princess of Darkness" sound to you?

-Archbishop Marv

sounds great!

hello there dear Joanna, it is so pleasant to see you here i don't know about you but i feel this is going to be great fun
AA

Me too

I fear that I must confess. I have no idea what a Blone Brownie is. Would somebody care to enlighten me?

If it is mistyped, it is really a blonde brownie. They are evil and not true Brownies. THey are not brown. They are bad! -Archbishop Marv

Destroy all Bl**de Brownies!
See, I can't even bring myself to say the phrase.

I....I once swam after consuming brownies...but I never did again...can I please join and take this load off myself?

Well we are most certainly glad to have you! Now you just need to tell me what you would like you title to be. Oh and forget that swimming after eating bit. You are absolved!

-Archbishop Marv

I would like to be the Televangelist, if that's all right.

At last we have a Televangelist! The title is yours. I was hoping to get out of an upcoming telly appearance!

Marv

When am I scheduled to appear?

another new member this is fantastic!!
AA

Hail to the mighty Brownie. I bow down before it. Allow me to be the keeper of the sacred Brownie paradox. The paradox is thus...
When you bake Brownies, you pour the sacred mix into the pan. Then you bake. You remove the holy item from the oven, and cut into Brownies. So what is the Holy item that you removed from the oven called? It can't be Brownies, because it is only one. It can't be a Brownie, because that is what you have when it is cut up. It cannot be the Brownie loaf, for it has no slices. Behold the sacred paradox.

Buff, you are most welcome. And your paradox is giving me much thought. You shal be as you wish, and I shll ponder upon this question....

Archbishop Marv

The paradox has hurt my brain! I must have one of Sister monsy's brownies before my brain melts...

Brownie....

(Welcome!!! to all the new members!)

To add to the confusion of the Brownie paradox, let me sat that the answer is not the Brownie cake either. A cake when sliced gets you peices of cake. But in order to get peices of Brownie, you must take one already sliced Brownie and break it apart.

Your Grace,

I humbly appeal to you to add my name to the list of those who are among the Church of the True Brownie. I must confess that Brownies are the penultimate refreshment of chocolate loving mammals. Nothing pleases me more than the thought of heaping mounds of brownies, stacked as far and as high as the eye can see. I entreat you with much vigor to allow me to enter the fold of this fine religion. I avidly await a reply from your Grace.

I must needs explain! In my zeal to add to our large family I forgot to log out so a RL friend could join... Please accept my apologies for any confusion this may have caused!
Marv