h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I only mentioned that as I don't like Snickers bars. Or liquidised railings (pic of me trying to swallow a railing...) I, of course, like all cake unliquidised. *sigh* Sadly I don't know anyone at Uni to cook me them and my sister is 3 hours away so I am THREE HOURS AWAY FROM CAKE *sobs uncontrollably* Oh why did I never learn to cook? *still sobbing* The best I can manage is Brown, which is quite nice, but a cake with Brown filling would be quite revolting *sniff*

Yes. Ancient Greek Homer. If you translate what he says in Greek, all the rhymes in his poems are actually dead easy as they all end with the word 'donut'. Apparently, it was a big thing in ancient Greece. Like the Germans having 42 words for 'the'. Well, American police have a code for 'donut break', don't they? When they say 'This is tangerine underwear barnaby barnaby yorvik, we are going down the high street for a code 76, I repeat, a code 76', they actually mean they are popping out for a donut.

When I said I was talking to a robot, I meant EV's SPB-2000. Can you get done for being Unpronounceable without Training? How many years do you get? Would do for the Russians...

*nibbles at a Tesco Value Scone*

Wizard of Oz? All roads lead to chocolate. I'd mention my pun on chocaholics, but I already have deep in the furry recesses of h2g2 so I'll leave it to you to find it yourselves. It's rather old now, anyway.

*finishes pint*

Think I'll go to Vestboy's launderette and have a cup of almost cappuccino. Might persuade him to install an almost coffee machine in the F&F.

Bumblebee - really great air-conditioning they have here, isn't it? Just right for people like us...
Wellies - thanks for saying about the book - you know, I was hoping they'd write a sequal explaining the Honoured Matres more, not a prequal, but I'm still very curious. So, are the Fremen in it, I saw that there's a dune map plus a map of Caladan (N.B. e-mail me at [email protected]) and I'd really like to know what happens in it.
So, how good is it compared to the originals? Is it likely to be a disappointment?

Have you had a Spooky Halloween? Have you come across dead people or corpses? Live near a graveyard? Heard bumps in the night? Want to talk about it?
Then come to the forum "Keeping A Dead Body In Your Home For Fun And Profit" - off A3286 on ventriloquism - and tell us all about it. Your experiences matter to us.

Anyone want a drink? They're on me!

I lift them off you then.

*picks up eight pints of beer and a bottle of vodka*

That should give you a little more freedom to move, and me a stinking hangover

Thanks, friend! I was beginning to think I was the only one in this pub! Drink up, you've got 6 pints to get through before lunch.

Lunch? It's teatime here.

*Downs one pint*

Have a beer to help me, mind out though, I've heard that they can be deathtraps for insects

evening all, can I get any drinks?

No thanks, I've still a couple left from Bluebottle.

Now where did that Vodka go?

*rests scythe up against the bar*

SQUEAAAAAK

*scribbles 'had a tough day with the Ludlow pest control chaps - a thimble full of ale would go down a treat! Thanks' Hands over the paper*

I'll see if I can find a thimble, most melted in The Fuel.

Yes here you go, any brew in particular?

*scribbles 'have you got any of Nanny Ogg's Old Scythe-sharpener?'

What is in The Fuel? Or don't we want to know?

I should be ok I haven't drunk any of it yet.

That'll be in the back, do you want some Scumble while you are waiting?

Scribbles *I'll pass thanks - the cat is tied up outside' *


*Adds 'Quoth says hello by the way'*

Something soft then?

And the Fuel is a drink whose recipie I shall post one day if I ever remember it.

*pokes a bar towel with the tiny scythe*

Aaaah, I think I know the type. A drink that results when you are only slightly drunk and you have easy access to someone else's drinks cabinet.

I think I'll be back on the lemonade fro the rest of the night.

Do I need a new one, or was it just in the way?

I do appologise but I must depare soon, the bar will be going back onto automatic service.