h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Over at F1697644?thread=8284219 I posted a long journal entry about 'my first big night out, my first serious infatuation and the first time I woke to find myself in Paradise'.

This is where you get to say if you think I was being completely honest and truthful, or if you think I'm a naughty person who tells whopping great lies about nightclubs and public transport and pirozhki.

I'll tell you the answer on Saturday 12 November.

I still believe the story is true.

True true true!

True. Especially the bit about Paradise being the last stop. Has to be if there is any justice in the world.

I vote true

Surely False. I asked Mr Google about Paradise and Melbourne, and the answer was a bit naughty. So you, Ivan, are a bit naughty too!

true In my version of reality, this just *has to be true!

Pheroneous, where did I mention Melbourne? The narrative takes place in Adelaide...

I think I voted for this in t'other thread.

True.

OK, so I had a word with he who knows best about everything and, as usual, he is mistaken. He muttered something about all these South Australian towns all being the same! As if. So there is a place called Paradise in or near Adelaide, which is nowhere near Melbourne. Which means your tale must be true. Except that I don't have a vote. He, who does, maintains that your veracity is unsound, unlike your geography.

I'm aware there is a place near Adelaide called Paradise and there is a major bus station there (thank you wikipedia losers) but I still think this is untrue.

I think Ivan is teasing us.

I think he's chuckling quietly in the corner with a beer, proud that he's managed to dupe so many of us. Doesn't mean I don't want it to be true though.

I've got problems with this.

You can't afford the cab, but within minutes you've scoffed pirozhki and visited the 'expensive deli' for cheescake.

You are fibbing, Sir.

FALSE.

Here's the deal.

The Mars Bar is real. I did go there on my first Big Gay Night Out in Adelaide, and I did indeed miss my chance with the chap in question. I did drink rather a lot of Bacardi. Gouger St is real. Victoria Square is real, it's also officially known these days as Tarndanyangga to acknowledge the Kaurna people of the Adelaide Plains and it contains a grumpy-looking statue of Vicky in bronze. The Central Market is real, and the Polish baked cheesecake from the Sevenhill Polish Deli stall is absolutely to die for, and it does make a wondefully decadent breakfast. Bus route 175 is real, or at least it was last time I had reason to know.

Paradise Interchange and the Adelaide O-Bahn are horribly real. Paradise used to be a cluster of commercial flower farms near the Darley Road ford, where we had to drive through a shallow bit of river on our way into town. Now there's a six-lane road and a bridge and a bus station. There's also a massive evangelical happy-clappy church, which surely set up shop there because of the address - which is funny because the area looks completely godforsaken now.

I did wake up at Paradise once, but I'd only been asleep for a second and I managed to get off the bus groggily and wake up properly before anyone noticed.

I was woken by a bus driver once after one of these all-night events, but that didn't happen at Paradise. It happened at Dernancourt, which makes for a less amusing story. I also woke up at Klemzig once, but that was OK as I hadn't missed my stop yet.

The pirozhki stall is real and their food is excellent and it would make a fabulous breakfast for a bit of bleary-eyed nightclub trash, but the stall didn't exist when I was 19. In fact, it only opened about five years after I left Adders. My pirozhki needs were previously met by my grandmother's pirukad, which are similar in concept but not really the same.

There were many all-nighters when I lived in Adders, but my first all-nighter of this sort didn't happen there. It happened in Guayaquil, Ecuador, when I was 17.

So there you go. Most of the elements of the story were true enough, but the full picture shows that my pants are on fire.

Ivan.

Ah, so all in all it is true enough, I'd say.

Great story, whichever way.

Thanks.

DDD - I see where you were coming from, but the cheesecake was about $4 and the taxi was about $30, so the cheesecake was definitely the budget option. You got the right answer, but for the wrong reason.

Well, everything is true in a way ... sometimes you have to insert a few little words like 'not' ...

Sneaky! It did make a good story all taken together.