h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

In between updating the Post (and fielding requests for errata corrections) and lazing around enjoying the holidays, I got to puzzling about something that bothers me.

You see, there are a lot of online discussions - on h2g2 and otherwhere - that go somewhat like this:

Poster 1: 'The quality of life of people on Earth is being damaged by pollution/criminal behaviour/gun ownership/etc. What can we do about it?'

Poster 2: '! I happen to enjoy polluting/engaging in criminal behaviour/ firing my gun within the city limits/ etc. How DARE anyone interfere with my FREEDOM?'

This tends to annoy me. I am unreasonable enough to believe that anyone who doesn't see the fallacy in that argument - namely, that other people have a right to live, too - is too dumb for me to be talking to. So I shut up, which usually, I believe, convinces the knothead on the other side of the computer firewall that he's won the argument with his devastating logic. So be it.

It got me to thinking, though. Those same people - the ones who believe they have a gods-given right to pollute other people's air and water, curse and swear in front of their kids and other people's, fire their guns, etc - are usually the same ones who are quick to rush in and insist that other people do things THEIR way. In particular, these folks usually believe that other people absolutely must:

- Speak the same language they do, in any public place.
- Bow to the hegemony of their god or gods.
- Only practice their own brand of sexual preference in a corner.

And I thought of olden times, when Elektra and I lived in Germany. For several years, we shared a telephone with our across-the-hall neighbours, two flats' worth, in a large apartment building full of students. Our neighbours were Iranian. nice guys and gals.

The phone would have been too expensive for one household, back then - and landlines were the only thing available in the early 80s - and we got along just fine, even when the young ladies woke us up at 5 am by calling Teheran, loudly.

We never told them this, but they made us giggle for an unseemly reason we would never have betrayed.

Farsi at five in the morning, uttered in a high-pitched voice, sounds for all the world like this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n76IKFlhJWo

At least, it does if you're sleepy and your Farsi's not any good. All I can say in Farsi is 'Yam passport daram,' which means 'I have a passport.' A useful phrase.

Anyhow, we didn't know about the answering machine message. I found out a couple of months later, when it came time for the new English course to start at the [Name Withheld] Vacuum Tube Company out in the suburbs. The day I showed up, I was mobbed by anxious office ladies.

'Oh, Gottseidank, you're okay.'

Me: 'Why wouldn't I be?'

Office Ladies: 'When we called, to make sure you were going to be our teacher, we got some incomprehensible message in Middle Eastern. We thought something had happened to you.'

All this, of course, in perfectly comprehensible German.

I laughed. It turned out my ladies - who belonged to the Translation Department - were linguistically gifted enough to recognise the word 'Mujahadeen'. Only, they couldn't tell if the speaker was for or against.

In case you don't know, the mujahadeen were on our side, back then. They were taking serious objection to the Soviet invasion of Afghanistan. (As opposed to any other invasions of Afghanistan by foreign powers before or since.) Anyway, our neighbours had just put up an encouraging message for their friends, and weren't up to any skullduggery whatsoever.

No more than our Kurdish friends, who made us chicken stew with potatoes, over rice, and taught us how to use a rice cooker for the first time. We reciprocated by explaining the coffeemaker to these engineering students, and then we all went over to Petros, who showed us how to make tzatziki and introduced us to Irene, the statuesque lesbian from Lesbos...

You see what I mean? Now, those are the kind of people I want to talk to. The ones who know that it's about making room.

Even if they sometimes say 'Maha, aha!' into the telephone at five am.

Ooh, what a wonderful story!

We have quite a few Kurds in my little town. Some sell vegetables (in fact most greengrocer's shops here in Denmark seem to be run by Kurds), some bake pizza. One of them even cooks the way the late Colonel Sanders did. This particular Kurds cooking skills alone are enough for me to call him my friend

We also have a Kurdish satellite tv station - Roj TV - transmitting worldwide and home to Kurdistan encouraging the Kurds there in their struggle for getting their own land out of parts of Turkey, Iraq, Iran and Syria

You might say it's about making room.

The Turkish government along with the US and other forces are trying to shut up Roj TV, claiming that the tv station is funded by the PKK (Partîya Karkerên Kurdistan = Labour Party of Kurdistan)

The PKK is listed as a terrorist organization by the European Union. The PKK itself claims to be an organization of freedom fighters.

I don't know enough to tell whether the PKK has commited acts of terror

The mujahedeen on the other hand...

I get you, Pierce. The politics can be impenetrable, but Kurds can be really welcoming people - and terrific cooks.

Our friend Genghiz was the kindest man I've ever met. He was from the foothills of Mt Ararat, and was Zoroastrian.

They do have a terrible problem - they're scattered across several national boundaries and have to deal with some skittish governments.

In hindsight I should probably have made it clearer that neither your German office Ladys, yourself or yours truly know if your neighbours had any sympathies for the mujahedeen or not just because they mentioned them - maybe they warned their folks at home against trusting them?

Anyway, coming from a national minority myself I believe the Kurds have the same rights to a homeland as everybody else - even if I dislike nationalism these days. Along with religion and racism it has led to too much bloodshed - and loss of freedom and other human rights - over the millenia.

But let's not go there right now. I just baked a lot of tomatoes - following what might very well be an old Kurdish recipe - and will join a nice New Years party in a few minutes.

Have a nice 2013 everybody

Thanks, Pierce. Happy New Year to you, as well.

Interesting story, as always. I've never had a Kurdish friend, but I did have an Armenian friend who made the best flatbread on the planet. Baked tomatoes sounds interesting.

I'll put the recipe on your personal space, Hyp

Oh, put it here. Sounds good.

Okay, here goes:

My assignment was to cook a side order to the main course (tenderloin of veal with potatoes, assorted baked root vegetables and gravy)

So I baked since we were 12 around the table

I halved them - the s that is - and baked them for one hour at +100C

A mixture/paste of chopped almonds, oil, balsamico, acacia honey, garlic, ground black pepper, salt and herbes de Provence was distributed evenly over the 24 halves (I found it easiest and most efficient using two teaspoons for this) and then they went back into the oven for another hour at +100C

Finally 5 to 10 minutes at +200C

According to comments from around the table I was quite succesful with this



ps: for the delay, I got sidetracked like a h2g2 rhread

Sounds great!