h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

here are some pointless questions that someone asked me. If anyone knows the answers to them it would really make me look very intelligent and worldly, so if you can help me out please do:

1.What was the average rainfall in Yemen in 1983
2.What is the average distance from earth to jupiter's second moon (i know that this is next to impossible to give a single answer to because of all the orbital dynamics involved, but even a number that sounds close to right would be good)
3.Who invented the hilighter?

That's it, any input would be greatly appreciated

#1... enough to make the plants grow.

#2... just about long enough to sleep off 5 pan galactic gargle blasters.

#3... Sine he has really not been born yet, I cannot say due to the fact some enterprising infant may decide to steal the idea and capitolize on it. See, the inventor was someone who was forced to leave the restaurant at the end of the unbiverse rather suddenly, due to his future, ex and present wives all arriving as a group, and since he was 8000 years late on alimony... well, you can guess the rest. Suffice to say he invented it in 2118 but sold it in 1978 to supplement his income as an artificial intelligence programmer at the Atari computer company.

Q~

This man/woman/fruitbat has been drinking. Which reminds me...

Seems to me question number 2 is fairly easy...

Earth's average position is about where the sun is, same applies to Jupiter and its moons...

So, the average distance is zero. Er...

*grin*

Okay. Let's say they spend half their time as close as they can get, and the other half as far away as they can get. Now, I don't know the distance between Jupiter and earth at their closest point, but I'll guess... oooh, ten light minutes or so. At their furthest, that makes twenty-eight light minutes. Average 'em out... nineteen light minutes?

Or, if you want it in kilometres (call it twenty light minutes because I can't be bothered with getting a calculator)... about 6,000,000,000 x 60... er... 360,000,000,000 kilometres. Three hundred and sixty thousand million kilometres.

I could be quite a way out here, mind

26199 (always willing to guess)

Number two is actually quite simple, the average distance from Earth to Adrastea (Jupiter's second moon) is just the average distance from Jupiter to the sun, which is 778,330,000 km. The average position of Jupiter's sceond moon is where Jupiter is itself. Therefore you don't have to worry about Adrasta, just Jupiter. Now think of Jupiter as being stationary and the earth still orbiting the sun; after one full orbit, an earth year, the average position of the earth is where the sun is. Accordingly the average distance from Jupiter to the earth is the distance from Jupiter to the sun. Of course Jupiter isn't stationary, but the same principal applies when it is in motion. Both planets have slightly elliptical paths, and their axes have 1.31° difference, but since we are talking about averages, of both time and space, and both are plentiful, this effect is negligable.

If you want to know the actual distance from Adrastea to Jupiter right now I would say (this is according to my calculations, which are very rough so it's not guarenteed to be that acurate) it is approximately 843,673,469 km give or take a couple of million km. (and yes, for all you wise asses out there I DIDN'T round that correctly at all)

As for the other questions, go to a library for the yemen thing, but you know Yemen is a big place you might want to try getting data for its capital, Sanaa. I don't know about the highlighter, maybe try calling some 800 numbers, like post-its or something, if you don't get any info at least you get to talk to the nice people.

Ok those pointless questions seem to be well and truly anserd so here is some more

1) what is the capital of estirra

2) what is the differance between european and african swolows

3) what is the air speed velocoty of a european swollo

OK I take it question one was meant to be 'What is the capital of Assyria?'

1 - there have been a few capitals over time - both Asshur (now Kalah-Shergat) and Calah (now Nimroud) were capitals...

2. From the greatest source on European and African Swallows, apparantly African swallows are non-migratory, and larger than their European counterparts....

3. What exactly do you mean by 'air speed velocity?' Fastest speed? Speed needed to achieve lift? Average travelling speed?

BCNU - Crescent

Okay, I admit, my figure was a factor of a thousand out

That's what happens when you're used to talking about metres but decide to use kilometres this time without actually converting between the two...

26199 (usually less than a factor of a thousand out)

1) I don't know nor do I think that I will ever need to know.
2) The difference is language.
3) Difficult to say, is it laiden? Is it a male/female? Is it pregnat?

No question originally posed by a Python is pointless. They are /were the foundations of Anglo-Saxon culture.

I think it all starts with the coconuts:-
King Arthur: "I have ridden here to ask your master to join me in a quest"
Castle Guard: "Your using coconuts" (for it is true - the knave was using two empty halves of coconuts to make the sound of a horse trotting)..."where did you get it from"
K.A.: "We found it"
C.G.: "The coconut is a tropical fruit"
K.A.: "The swallow is found in tropical climes yet he is no stranger to our shore"
C.G.: "Are you suggesting that coconuts migrate?"
K.A.: "Not at all, he could have carried it"
etc.

This may not be word perfect, as since leaving college I have had to do other things than just sitting in pubs endlessly repeating Monty Python monologues....which is a great pity .

1) The Capital of Assyria? That would be A then
2) The Difference? We are not about to get racist over which continent a Swallow comes from now are we? Wouldn't like this site to be labeled as biased against those from Africa now would we?
3) Air speed? Depends how you fire it

The African and European swallows are not different races, but rather different Genuses, which would make us Genus-ist ... and I, for one, am not paying Phil Collins any more royalties

All this talk about African and European swallows. How come no-one seems to want to talk about Australian swallows? People in the Northern hemisphere can sometimes be so exclusivist, although I'm sure they mean no offence.

Walter of Colne

I didn't think you had swallows in Australia - I thought you just opened your throat and chugged it straight down.

For some reason so did I.
But in anser to th swollo thing the european one migrates and the african does not.

Gooday Wandrin'star,

You are still out there then; glad you appreciate the distinctive Australian swallow.

Walter of Colne

So what, a European swallow is just an African one that got bored and went for a holiday northwards?

I gess so I dont know all that meny to ask