h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Okay, Goths. Malcontent youths who dye their hair black, only ever wear black or purple clothes and have an unhealthy obsession with death and bands called things like "Nuns of Doom."
The big question is, though:
Why are Goths only ever tall, incredibly skinny blokes or short, incredibly fat birds?

Because well proportioned youths are rarely malcontent as they date well proportioned cheerleaders or footballers

Amen brother!

Hey guys/gals I disagree - Goths are just people - admittedly sometimes weird sick strange ones - BUT they are not alone in that - they may dress unlike you or I and listen to some particularly odd music but you can't stereotype them. My son is/was a Goth - he is about 5ft 11 with red hair (natural) and is certainly not skinny. His fiancee is size 8 with long black hair - you just haven't met the right Goths yet!

Goths are, very simply put, the 90's version of the hippies.

The motto (then and now)?

Do your own thing.

I agree completely. Goths are a reaction to a social setting where the conforming to only "nice" and "normal" styles is acceptable. Normal is daytime, fun in the sun, working out, looking as healthy as possible, going on diets, wearing sports wear and trainers. Let's face it.. that can get pretty boring even to those who don't read Crowley and Poe.

When you get right down to it, Goths are tamer by today's standards than hippies were to theirs. Look at the ratios:

Goths:Gangwars
Hippies:fifties

OK. I'm not a goth exactly (although I am told I'm showing signs of becoming one). I am called a freak occasionally (usually by the people that I think are freaks, or at least narrow minded little idiots who will probably wind up one day becoming criminals) and I don't mind really because at least that means I have at least something that sets me apart from everyone else. I have died my hair black and I do wear black and purple (and red)but I know several absolutely 'normal' people who only wear those colours. ANd yes I do think about death quite a bit but I also think about life, what it means, why I'm here etcetera as I'm sure most people do.
However I do know a few people who call themselves goths and none of them fit you're description. None of them are tall skinny blokes or short fat birds they are all pretty much normal (there's that annoying word again) in height and shape and weight. However should I ever cross that threshold I would probably be quite close to the short fat girl goth steriotype.
Sorry about the spelling!
S.

H2g2 should not be used by small minded people to perpetuate stereotypes. I don't really know any Goths but I see them around the place all the time. Yes, they do wear dark colours and yes they do seem preoccupied with death. However, I imagine that they are just like any other group in society; some are tall & skinny, some short and plump, some are cranky, some happy, some friendly and others a******s.

I love seeing freaky looking people around the place. This can be a fairly intolerant sort of world to live in but freaks are a constant and in your face reminder that each person is an individual and has the right to think/dress/act as they want to. The last thing we need as we approach the big 2000 is a pack of drones who will do as they are told, when they are told.

Go Goths, Go!

Oh, dear. Looks like I've raised more hackles than laughs. I fully expected to offend more people by using the word "birds" than anything but there you go. (Not that I wanted to offend anybody - I just expected to.)
One thing I've noticed a lot in replies is the cry of "individuality". It is a mistake to assume that being a goth is being an individual. Certainly the decision not to follow the herd and to look different from the *majority* of your peers is commendable and is a step towards individuality. However, you can't dye your hair the same colour as all your mates, wear the same black jeans as them and put on the same heavy make up and go "there, at last I'm an individual."
I've also been accused of stereotyping goths. Admittedly I've exaggerated for comic effect and I'll come clean: I know that not all goths are either tall skinny blokes or short fat girls. However, a lot of them are (maybe it's a local thing or maybe you've noticed it too.) I simply wondered why this was but I suppose in a sense, "Wretched" (hope you're feeling better soon, btw. ) got close to the mark. Most goths are teenage to early twenties and this is a time when we feel an incredible desire to "fit in". If you're "the wrong shape", ie. not average, then you're apt to feel left out because there's nothing you can do to look like the others. Slowly (I don't know anyone who became a goth overnight) you realise that you don't want to be like them anyway and there's this other bunch of cool guys who feel the same way and have the same preoccupations. Eventually you drift into gothness. I *know* not all goths come about this way and it's all armchair psychology anyway but I'm sure it's a pretty valid observation.
Now, how about discussing this instead of calling me small-minded on the basis of one posting?

Goths...hmmm...I find them goth birds really attractive, but that's because I keep seeing ones that conform to my beauty standards/things/whatchamacallits (ie - slim, small, pale (make-up, I know), long hair). It might be a local thing about the short, fat birds then. And I'm a person that wears MUCH black, because I like it, but all my mates include lots of rugger-types and punks (colourful people that is).

But Goths ARE a pretty odd bunch (I reckon). Just from the sheer point of view that they have GOT to be different to be able to find (and afford) all them DEADLY leather coats! I've been looking for a long black leather coat for f**king years and I've never even come close to one. And they have loads and they won't tell me where they got them! Boo... It's good to see them around though. Nice people all in all...very pleasant to chat to in a pub or what have ya...

For an insight into some US goths, have a look at this site:

http://www.dma.org/~mitchelj/evil/wallofevil.html

I want one of these, too... This may even be the winter I get one!

http://www.aussiecatalog.com/shopfiles/drizabone.htm

Another question...

When the (original) Goths sacked Rome in about 400 A.D., where did it go to sign on?
Surely all the roads led to itself

The Coliseum?

Not true. A lot of the Gothic females I know are tall and thin.

Biased, if you ask me--the website, that is. The people who post there all seem to be genuine Satan worshippers, which all Goths certainly are not.

can i sit quietly in a corner and raise a small but imho important objection?
judjing people, categorising, pigeonholing people on appearance is unhealthy, silly + wasteful.
people call me lots of things, depending on what i look like at that moment, and their perception of what that represents. i'm too colourful to get called goth that often anymore, but i get hippy, traveller, punk, biker, eco-warrior, gypsy, hunt sab, dirty squatter, junkie + freak. (i like freak best, it says more about Them than it does about me) some of these things might be partly accurate, sometimes, but mainly, always, i'm ME. and i enjoy being the opposite of small-minded or unflattering assumptions (even if the assumption might be right).
so there.

I happen to enjoy being called a freak myself.

Black is black
I want my baby back
If I had my way
She'd be here today oh oh
What can I do?
Cause I, I'm feelin blue

(There's entirely too little singing in this thread, too. )

There's too little singing all over the place.