h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

It was here on my desk, about an hour ago. Now it's gone.

It's a thin brown and whitish bit of paper, about five inches by two and a bit and has a picture of the Queen on one side, Charles Darwin on the other.

If anyone sees it, could I have it back please?

no, ive already spent it

hope you find it, if you do can you ask whatever gremlin took it to do the same with my mother in law?

Nope.. it's still on your desk. You just haven't look in the right place..

It's ok, I've just found a fiver I didn't think I had and remembered what happened. I spent half of it going to the gym earlier, which also expains why my shoulders ache.

Sorry to trouble everyone unneccessarily, and sorry I can't help with the mother in law

Knew it! I have the same effect on Hubby when he loses things!!

Bet he loves you for it, too... 'told you so'

Oi! That was the fiver tha my mum lost the other day!

Never mind, you'll find 5p later today

A normal conversation in the B'Elana household(three males and me): Mum, where is....?' 'It's over there, directly at...' 'No, it isn't!' *Goes looking herself* 'And what do you think this is?' (It's exactly where I said it was )
Glad you found out about your money, though, Rich.

I can't remember who said it:

Repeat to yourself - The womb is not a locating device, the womb is not a locating device...

It's amazing how well it works though - I can help my family (yes, husband too) even over the phone! And B'El, girls do it too...

Dad: Anyone seen my wallet

Us lot: no

Dad: I had it last night

Us lot: Haven't seen it

Dad: Well, it's got to be here somewhere!!!

Us lot root around to find said wallet.

Dad: Have you found my wallet yet?

Us lot: No. When did you have it last?

Dad: At the pub.

Us lot: That explains a lot then.

Dad: oi!! Cheeky!!!

........................................................

Next day.

Dad: Right I can't do the shopping until I've found my wallet. I have no money.

Us lot: Still haven't found it yet then dad?




A short while later.

Mum: Dad found his wallet.

Us lot: Yes? Where was it?

Mum: Underneath the mattress!!!!!

I remember that!!

He lost his keys a couple of months ago so I asked him if they were underneath the mattress...you should have seen the look he gave me!!!

"Two coats and an umbrella of mine were stolen from my office, unless I left them somewhere else"
~James Thurber

I'll remember that one!

One of our staff phoned the police because he thought the lawnmower had been stolen from the garden. Turned out someone else had put it away in the shed overnight.

Typical!

Update: I put the fiver in my shorts, which I've now lost.

How could you lose it in there?

When did you last see your shorts?