h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

In the further assault on coffee, a recent trend in coffee ordering is the request for "half-caf," a mug filled halfway with real coffee, then topped off with decaf. I could go on about the total absence of common sense behind this, but I'm hoping it's immediately apparent...

And of course, to finish off the beverage of indecisivness, you must
add half and half(cream and milk) along with one half a cube of sugar, sliced carefully
through it's center.

...And served in a demi-tasse so you ony get half of the amount anyway!

Why, oh why, did I know you'd end up here right away?
Coffee, to put my two cents in, is good, but only in moderation. I drank a whole pot this morning and my body would really like to sleep, but the convulsive twitching gets in the way of the idea.

It was the first thing I looked up when I got here, you're shocked, I can tell.

What's this I hear about moderation? Or sleep, for that matter?

Cofee is great, the more and higher caffine the better. That twitching is part of the fun. I'd loev a cofee that would guarantee me 24 hours without sleep from only two cups.

A coffee like that would deny you the pleasure of the coffee smell and taste, though. We have different coffee philosophies, I guess

I tend to divide my coffee needs into two:

1) A nice cup of steaming freshly brewed 'proper coffee'. This is ground coffee put into a cafetiere or percolater and consumed slowly over the paper. N.b. no milk or sugar.

2) Three teaspoons of instant + three of sugar in a pint mug. No milk, downed within 5 mins. This is consumed over revision/essays. Of course, ProPlus can be substituted ( http://www.h2g2.com/P79436 ) but it doesn't heat you up

My goodness, darling, we need to get you into an Instant Coffee Cessation program right away! Want me to send you some of the real thing???

Oh no, I've got lots of the proper stuff. I'm drinking Kenyan Blue Mountain at the mo, OK, it's not Jamaican but I can't afford the real real stuff. It's just that the ground beans tend to get stuck between your teeth if you eat it by the spoonful

Ah well, I shall worry no more then Enjoy your coffee!!!

Oh I will ...

Aha, a kindred spirit!

I really don't see the point of decaffinated coffee.

I used to get migraine's so I had to cut out caffeine. I had to give up all together rather than drink decaffeinated! I'm ok now though. My oldest sister is a real serious coffee drinker and when the Doctor told her to give up she managed to last 2 days before we forced her to drink some coffee because she was in such a bad mood!

Put decaf in the coffeemaker where you work for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.

You're evil! But I like!

You have all obviously missed the point - TEA is by far the Superior Drink. Coffee is okay if you are sleepy in the morning, just as an asprin is okay if you have a headache - but Tea is what should be drank for fun!
(Expecting a lot of disagreement)

I hate tea! It smells and tastes like dead leaves! It just doesn't compare to the kick of the caffeine in the coffee!

Is that enough disagreement to start with?

Yes, that will do to start.