h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

No one likes you.
You're alone for a reason.
You deserve to die.
F... off and die.

I wanna take this knife and stab myself in the throat. I hate it when I feel sorry for myself.

You're upset now. I'll be here.

I'm here, too

And me.

zdt

Do you ever get upset about something without turning on yourself? (This is a genuine question: I'm curious, not accusatory.)

hey i've had a bad day too..come on lets have a you know we care about you

Depends what you mean by 'ever', 'upset' and 'something.

Dodging the question!

I'll say it again. Forgive yourself.

Bad days happen. Particularly bad days are a right pain. As long as you don't deliberately try to make things as hard as possible for yourself, all the bad things are NOT your own fault. They might be mistakes, and for mistakes, the key is to learn, and FORGIVE.

Now.

Fine. If I get 'upset' that I don't regard myself as having any right to be upset about myself then I will tend towards having urges to take some kind of punitive action against myself.
If I am upset about something to do with my core-beliefs about myself then there are 'rules' that can lead to me wanting to behave destructively towards myself.
In the past I used to cry and cry I was so unhappy, I would use self-harm - burning, cutting, banging head against the wall, pulling hair out, punching a wall, punching my face and so on - to cause physical pain to cancel out or bring under control the emotional hurt.

I really have no idea what to say, harming and hurting yourself is just as destructive as harming and hurting somebody else would be, so i see your dilemma, but have no advice

Thanks for the explanation. I thought it might be that negative feelings in general make you tend towards self-harm, but that seems to be more a thing of your past.

Pretty much, yeah... Tisn't as though negative sh!t doesn't still bring about an urge, just not one I am much inclined to act upon. Tis mostly about punish myself for 'whatever'. If one sees oneself as worthless then being self-destructive to get some control hardly seems as bad as inflicting some such thing on another who has worth. Hoom.

I see what you mean.

You do?

Either that, or I think I do! Let's see...

All negative feelings tend to bring on an urge to self-harm. However, you have personal rules regarding self-harm, and will only do it if you fail to live up to your own set of standards. One cause for self-harm is being upset about something your rules say you don't deserve to feel upset about.

You'd much rather be angry with yourself for causing someone to behave in a particular way towards you, than be angry at them for behaving that way. This is because you consider others to have far more worth than you. Also, since you can't control others (and don't consider it your place to do so), you instead gain a sense of control over a situation from the punishment you inflict on yourself.

This is what I gather from what you've said on this thread. Is it about right?

Not quite all, but, probly [sic] the majority to varying degrees. Otherwise a completely accurate summation.

Glad to know I'm on the right track, at least.

Which bits did I get wrong, if you don't mind my asking?

"All negative feelings tend to bring on an urge to self-harm." - Snailrind

'Not quite all, but, probly [sic] the majority to varying degrees.' - Me.

Sorry I wasn't clearer.

Ah, right!