h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Erm, interesting reading matter.

That is one fine giant cockerel, no doubt. (wonders if she should get a train to aforementioned home of newspaper, to warn them.) Of course aforementioned home of newspaper is near enough to call in on Nigel.

Probably one of the least coherent postings I've done recently, but you know what I'm talking about, unless you don't. Do I?

And why do cockerels crow at dawn?? And so loudly? I think alarm clocks should be made with a cockerel crow sound instead of a bell or a bleep.

Hearing roosters crow always soothes me. They remind me of my grandparents' farm.

Interesting! So, if associated with happy memories, it can be OK to be wakened by roosters.

I remember being wakened by roosters in Greece, every morning, very early. Actually, that's a happy memory also. Better than mosquitoes. If anyone ever tells me that being wakened by the whine of a mosquito at 3am is good, I will honour them as a saint.

I'm going to invent that alarm clock. The Happy Rooster clock. I think I might be a millionaire by next week. No? Hmm. OK.

Clock will also speak, say 'cock a doodle don't go back to sleep, you'll miss your train.'

I just said that, 'cos your title is funny. Cock a doodle don't.

Does a rooster sound actually sound like cock a doodle do?

Just like does a sneeze actually sound like a-tishoo? A what? A tish hoo. Ah tish hoo. How do you spell sneeze sound?

Can one write an abstract sound? mmm very philosphical.

In German, roosters say, 'Kikeriki'.

I think they say, 'Er-er-er-er-errrrr....'

Ah, the musicians of Bremen!

The image reminds me of Foghorn Leghorn.

I heard about someone who tried to start an egg farm, so he ordered dozens of little chicks. Turns out they were all male. The neighbors began complaining about the noise at dawn.

The fighting must have been awful.

My grandfather had two roosters once. One was a regular size, the other a bantam. They would have crowing contests early in the morning, which we kids found highly entertaining. When we stayed at the farm one summer, my mother remarked at breakfast that those roosters would come in and crow on the bedposts if you'd let them. She was joking.

The next morning, I saw my grandfather by the side of the house, chasing away the roosters.

'Shh, you old banty rooster,' he said. 'You'll wake up that purty woman!' (His name for his daughter-in-law.)

Two more anecdotes (I never have just one, you know ):

--When I was in Hana, a town at the southern end of Maui, the motel I stayed in was next to a chicken farm. Yes, we heard the roosters crowing every morning we were there.

--In "Cold Mountain," there's an early chapter showing Ada's difficulties fending for herself after her father dies. For one thing, a rooster keeps trying to attack her. Then Ruby arrives. Ruby is not afraid to remove the rooster's head.

Its a good thing we're not talking about emus, or I would have to bring in Annie Proulx.

Kikeriki!

Er ...errr

Hmmm. A challenge for my philosphical questioning. I like kikeriki though.

Conclusion. One probably can't write an animal sound as they actually sound.

Moo Cheep cheep Quack Baaaa Woof woof Meeeow . Although the meeeow is quite close. Actually, baaaa is quite close also.

what is she talking about, asked the sheep in sheep language.

Forget philosophical questions, kid, and stick to reading these fine anecdotes. Says an inner voice, in a language known to me.



I guess our dream dialogues are in the languages we know. And dream animals sound like we know them to sound.

For *those of us* who are multi lingual, I guess dream dialogues can be in selected languages.

I knew someone who had a dream dialogue in a language she didn't understand, but there were English subtitles.

Do I in fact have dream dialogues? You can't answer that one? Oh, OK then. Am I off topic . Definitely.

There's an old folk song in which the cat said "Fiddle-I-fee." Maybe it was an actor cat who had studied with the acting greats. And after hours, he would drink cocktails.

I'm more of a Whisky and Rye observer. Not so much into Battles.

Here follows a list of our animal sounds:

Cockerel: Kukelekuu (u like German ü)
Dog: Woef (sounds like woof)
Cat: Miauw (sounds like meeow)
Frog and duck: Kwak (same as quack, just not as posh)
Birds: Tsjiep or piep (same as cheep)
Pig: Knor
Cow: Boe (similar to moo)
Sheep: Bèèèh
Goat: Mèèhèèhèèhèèhèè
Imaginary "krullevaar" bird: Prr...Talieloe! (probably no known equivalent available)

I like the pig going 'Knor'.

I see it's business as usual along the Dutch/Anglo-Frisian border.

Don't forget to pronounce the hard K in knor. Initially my youngest had trouble with that, leading to pigs saying Nornor.

I did not introduce him to boolean variables at the time.

So kids in the Netherlands who haven't learned to talk properly yet have American accents?

Boolean variables must surely have an interesting speech pattern.

Speaking of talking animals, Sandra Boynton has done another great project. Here's her official video, 'C.A.T.', from 'Hog Wild'.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TJENHesgQP0

and plus

How many men would like a big cockerel ?

tries

the thought put me off typing

Ah right, a new take on animal sounds, from the Dutch/Anglo Frisian border. Eh?

Thinks about Dutch/Anglo Frisian and clever bi lingual people.

Nice sounds.

(heads out to translate into synth music)