And the light did blinketh, and the timer did sound upon the land, and the people did watch as the oven was open'd and the brownie descended. And the brownie did say 'I come to you to bring unto the masses true happiness'. And the people did eat the brownie's flesh, and they did lick the brownie's frosting. And it was good.
- from the Holy Book of Brownie
Created three years ago, the Church Of The True Brownie now has over one hundred acolytes, whom are all devoted to the worship and study of the Brownie. The study of the Brownie has long been shrouded in secret by the ones who know it the most. However, those who join the church find that the church's teachings allow many simple paths to enlightenment partaking in the worship of Brownie as you go.
Even though our church does not have a strict bible or scripture, the teachings of our church are quite simple and have very few rules. However the rules we have must be enforced with quite strictness:
- Not partaking of the Brownie
- Claiming that a Blondie is a Brownie
Tbe Ten Holy Suggestions
Marv the Great, one of the original members of the church and now the archbishop of The Church Of The True Brownie first wrote down the ten suggestions when reformeing the church into what it is today. His ten Holy Suggestions are now the basis of all Brownie worship and teaching.
Historical Events of Brownie Significance
The followers of The True Brownie, in the past, have undertaken crusades of knowledge that have took them across the world. The most famous of these crusades has been the crusade in search of the Ark of the Brownie. After finding a mysterious map with an 'X', they set off to find the holy Ark.
In one of the darker moments of the church's history, the sacred fudge was stolen, and the members were unable to partake in the eating of the Brownie. Fortunately, the fudge was recovered, and everyone ate Brownies again. The all-important Recipe is always kept in a safe place, so while ingredients and brownies may be stolen, the Brownie can always be prepared by the church faithful.
The Followers Of Brownie
The Church of The True Brownie is growing larger and larger as more and more people convert to this most illustrious faith. Its populariity continues to grow. There are many positions within the church that still are in need of filling, so if you feel the call to join our church, do not hesitate to come in and be converted. The Church of the True Brownie propagates good clean living, and good cooking as a way of life. All brownies will be eaten with the official eating implement, The Spork (foon). Share and enjoy!
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Marv the Grate: Arch BishopFenchurch: High PriestessGw7en: High PriestessLoonytoons: Lord WarlockMonsy: Abbess Shazz: OrganistNM: PriestShorty: ChocolyteBaron Shatturday: Lord High InquisitorZed: Master Inquisitor Inferno: Chaotic Bard Skahbey: Apostate Exorsist Extrordinaire Old Uncle Zarniwoop : Prophet of the Holy Cacao BeanIcarus: SeraphZonker: Lord Exchequer Sporkulious Eglon: Saint Spork of Abbot Frizzychick: Animal Keeper