h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

All's fair in love and war. And no, I am not in love woth you.

fine then *dons stillettos and kicks husssuan where it hurts* Alls Fair

*swings down from a large building via a vine rope lozzing tomatoes at everyone*

*grabs another vine rope and swings over to creachy using amazing stillettos*

*glides with ease from vine to vine in an effort to escape. leaves slippery banana icing on the vines he has just used in an attempt to cause Phoenix some difficulty*

*pulls on fingeless leather gloves and glides after creacy, kicks his backside with amazing stilettoes*

*a look of shock and horror gets confuzzled on creachy's face as he stops mid swing and slides down his vine*


OW!

*pulls out an extremely large stick with 'WILFRED' etched down one side and bops phoenix on the head*

*brings leg up in a high kick, wilfred the stick gets caught between the amazing stilletoes and snaps. brings leg down and bops creachy on the heand*

*picks up two pieces that were formerly wilfred. places them back together and watches them fuse back together.*


wilfred is made of sapien pearwood. theoretically, he can't be 'snapped' but i'll let you off, you didn't know. nice shoes by the way

yes, i dont really wear these sort of things but they do the job. *sweeps up another stick and crouches low ready, then getting bored high kicks creachy with the as's (amazing stilettos) then crouches low*

*takes the kick on the chin, shakes his head as a few birdies appear to be circling it and regains his composure*

read the petty hates thread per chance.?

*ducks all of a sudden and swings wilfred at phoenix's feet then brings it up fast towards her jaw*

by the way, i instated you as one of the council in Hades. not sure if you are one of the established Goddesses or just one in training like me?

*staggers backwards and sweeps own stick and brings it round creachy's back and hooks it so he falls on his behind*

I am nearly a proper godess! I have been a trainee for AGES

*gets up and dusts his rump off*

well, they say participation is the path to true Godhood. with a council we can participate without even being there, as long as someone is there to sign the forms and dot the 'T's, or something like that

*punches phoenix on the nose. a small crack is heard and it didn't come from creachy*

these were new on this morning

Sorry. *Sweeps the stick up and hits creachy in the ribs. a loud crack appears. * that would be 3 broken ribs. and i do not need a broken nose, is that anyway for someone such as me too look?

oh, but it's alright for you to break my ribs one rule for one, one for another eh?

look at this, this is going to need bandaging

Well I'm a lady and a broken nose is not sutible. *jumps up to the top of a building and looks at creachy*

well, just look at this one, *points to third rib down* it's sticking out!

that'll bleed that will. that means a dry cleaners bill for you, you self proclaimed Lady i've never known a lady to accost an innocent man in such a manner. i really don't know what the world is coming to if nice young women go about brutally attacking..

*passes out from loss of blood*

oops *jumps down and waves a hand and the ribs heal*

*Sneaks up behind Phoniex and stabs her in the back.*

*Walks in half-heartedly*

Any of you seen a large tank, will Christmas Tree lights on it?