h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I'd love to invite you to the top of the Tower but the Baron, my father, would find us. Meet me round the back of the LUMBERYARD

I am on my way. We must be circumspect or out plan will be discovered. We should ensure the area is properly RECONNOITRED. Although I have been told that the old duffer is short sighted and hard of hearing, is that true

Damn no "A" That's what you get for being HAMMERED by your father's gaurds

I shall REDRESS the situation with the guards before I undress you

Perhaps I'd better ask my girlfriends PERMISSION?

Since when did you have MISSIONARY morals LW, any ol' dog'll do is what you normally say. And BB certainly fills that bill, thats why she's happy to get what's available.

Pity it had to be a decripid old lot like you and Kif and all the rest, she could have had a young virile stud like yours truly (despite what you twisted lot say, "simply the best"

How dare you, suh!! I've never said that about damsels. As well any one will you tell you. I have always treated the damsels with kindness and respect as they deserve. And you insult dear BB by your remarks. Take that and that RARELY have I ever met such a blaggard as yourself.Take that and that and let that be a lesson to you.

It's all a matter of RELATIVITY of course, my comparison was with the high moral standards of the Varlet Code we would never resort to clandestine adventures behind the Lumberyard, grassy Meadows under the Moonlight is more like our behavoir.

By the way, keep the 's and stuff coming, we collect them and sell them to your Chef, you will be eating them tomorrow.

there be MIGHTILY big words plus's and 's being thrown about, all in the names of damsel chasing, thinks I'll go 't' tavern and have a bevvie instead

You jest so LIGHTLY with the feelings of the Damsels!

Aye wise woman, they use words so THOUGHTLESSLY with no regard for the feelings of others, they should be flogged with wet lettuce at Dawn.

If we did that at dawn.. it would be a bit SLY..because everyone will be in bed fast asleep..

(bit feeble Lil)

Hah! I could have EASILY sorted it out.. Only I am squiffy!!

They would soon wake up the way I would do it, a few TALLHO'S and trumpet blasts followed by piercing screams should do the trick, (it's tha application of water that does it)

Are you trying to SHOW me how to play this game? Hah!!!

Wouldn't think of it good lady, anyway it would take a HOWITZER to educate some people......Where did the 'W' come from (hic!!!)

(the S was an apostrophe

Sorry Lil it's not fair or honourable to show ZERO tolerance....(dodges clubbing blows)..