h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Some suggestions for Room 101:

1) Boy bands
A bunch of childish men airy-fairy'in about like women singing annoying songs about their lover whose left them, or some other crud. Or the type like T*ke that who insist on singing cheesy songs. Please save us from them!!!

2) Pop-up adverts
You are merrily surfing the web, and then a pointless window pops up advising you on debt consolidation or some other useless (well useless to me anyway) rubbish. They are annoying, they come up in groups, they come up more than once, you reject them more that once, you end up closing down the browser window you want and you egt left with the stupid thing, and so on! Give me banner ads anyday!!!

3) Car Alarms
They are noisy, irritating loud alarms that just drive insane!!! And those ones on the cars of paranoid people, that go off if you brush past the headlight, and when you are trying to get through a narrow space, you end up potentially setting them off.

4) Christmas
I hate Christmas. The hype is ridiculous. Trees, lights everywhere, tacky decorations, men dressed in ridiculous red suits and whte beards, lack of parking, mass histerior, lack of room to actually move in shopping centres...

1. Laughter Tracks
They're always on American sitcoms and some British sitcoms and lower the shows quality by about 400%. If the shows were really funny, people would be laughing anyway and not need the show to do it for them.

2. People who ride their bikes with their hands off
The only thing they are good for is organ donation when they've crashed into something head first.

Slugs - cannot see the point of them and hate it when they've crawled all over my kitchen floor.

Women who cannot dress properly. - I'm no follower of Trinny & Susanne and no clothes horse myself but I do see some women who mix patterns together & it just does not look good.

People who are not happy unless they're moaning. - I currently work with someone like this and somedays I want to bang her head against a brick wall to shut her up. Thankfully she is leaving the company at the end of March.

Mothers who don't control their children - why bother having kids in the first place?

That will do for now on my list but I could probably think of more.

Hmmm, why pick on slugs? They're not very pretty but is that any reason to hate someone? And why only women who don't dress well? Let women dress however they want and make it illegal for men to wear long trousers and no shirt. This is the only hope for the world. You know it makes sense.
So... my nominations are:
1) Unwanted noise
2)People who stand in shop doorways, on the left of the escalator or just generally block your way.
3) Motorists using their mobile phones
4)Mosquitos
5)Religious faith (ie believing something even if it isn't true)
6)"Real men"

Impressionists that have to announce their impressions-
"Yes it's me Frank Spencer-ooh Betty I'm on Dead Ringers"

Hack film critics who write snappy phrases to get on posters.
"Fun rollercoaster ride for all the family"- Jonathan/Paul Ross

Newspapers that naturally assume you are retarded
"Sir John Guilgud will be best known to Sun readers as the butler in Arthur."

Regional TV presenters who giggle to each other after making feeble puns.
"We call the Look East breakfast Porridge in Norwich."

Dr Gillian McKeith
Oh thank you Dara O'Brien

Men, who run up to a football, and shout "Rooooony" just before they kick it.