h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

One afternoon a man came home from work to find total mayhem in his house. His three children were outside, still in their pyjamas, playing in the mud, with rubbish strewn all around the front yard.
The front door to the house was open.
Proceeding into the hall, he found an even bigger mess. A lamp had been knocked over, the TV was loudly blaring a cartoon channel, the family room was strewn with toys and various items of clothing. In the kitchen, dishes filled the sink, breakfast food was spilled on the worktop, dog food was spilled on the floor, a broken glass lay under the table, and a small pile of sand was spread by the back door. He quickly headed up the stairs, stepping over toys and more piles of clothes, looking for his wife.
She was in bed in her pyjamas, reading a novel. He looked at her bewildered and asked, "What happened here today?" She again smiled and answered, "You know every day when you come home from work and ask me what did I do today?"
"Yes", he replied.
She answered, "Well, today I didn't do it."