h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Let it hereby be known that the Kingdom of Balwyniti will be holding a gala feast and celebration for her Royal Highness, Queen Alien, on the 9th of January 2001. It is anticipated that the celebrations will last at least for the 48 hour duration, and any suggestions for activities to take place during the festivities will be welcomed......

Long live the Queen!

I suggest a cheesecake eating contest...

I certainly wouldn't be describing that as a bad idea...

How would you be describing it then!??

As a fine one of course! But I need more....where are all the subjects when you need them..

Who knows!??

*Enter crusty old butler, Thruthelthrolth*
Sire, St. Dragonfly, the bakery elves are mixing several hundred pounds of of biscuit crumb base for the cheesecake even as we speak. As to whether it will be several small cheesecakes or one huge cake, only the elves know.

Hahahhaahahha!!!!

Gosh, that's excellent, Gosh!!!

And I was about to say, who would want more faithful subjects than me!??

Ah! One can always count on one's crusty old butler... Dear Thruthelthrolth, I do believe this event will require even wider punlicity than you managed for the kingdom itself...

Ah! One can always count on one's crusty old butler... Dear Thruthelthrolth, I do believe this event will require even wider publicity than you managed for the kingdom itself...

Certainly not the hamsters, dear Dragonfly...

And that wasn't a double post, Thruthelthrolth, it must be your hearing aid playing up...

Good idea, we could have a winking contest...

Hmmm, maybe I should get the elves to take a look at it Sire. I thought that it was just the castle's echo, until I noticed that one of the words had changed. And I haven't been able to pick up any cricket for some weeks now. Instead, I keep hearing about a ghastly thing called 'Premyerleagfootball'. It sounds truly awful.

Premyerleagfootball? Sounds truly horrid, I shant be introducing that to the Kingdom....but perhaps, trusty butler, you might favour us with some festival suggestions?

Hahahhaaa....

Sire, the festivities might include the fpllowing:
A pastry throwing tournament (the elves are happy to be the targets) followed by an icecream eating competition!

A grand parade in fancy dress (ie court regalia) each outfit to be described in minute detail and prizes awarded by your Royal Highnesses for various categories.

Sould we also approach the musician's guild to provide marches, chansons and gavottes?

Sire, I beleive a flinging contest would be an excellent idea. I think bog snorkelling would be a noble tournament too, as would dwile flonking, and also welly throwing.

Not too mention cow (or hamster) tipping

All very fine ideas......though I don't know if we should necessarily throw things at the elves.......the musicians guild sounds a fine idea, but I'm trying to keep this a secret from the Queen so I don't think that'd work...sssshhh! everybody, don't tell her...