h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*Where else would you find miners? but down a ...?*

Granny & SM roar past ex, one either side, SM threatens to highside it but recovers control, and it's Ducbrushi & Honda side by side crossing the line for the start of the third lap.....

*munch*

*SM valiantly tries to keep up on the straight, and only falls back a little due to her smaller engine. They pass the miner again, who is left straight in ex's path...*

exR piles into the miner, totalling the Creepy Coupe 2. Sheering off, she's left with nothing but one wheel. Valiently wheeling it down the track, she hits a bump, and goes flying into the wall*splat*, then slides down it into a puddle of ectoplasmic goo.

A hand grasping a bicycle pump emerges from the puddle. Fixing the pump to a corner of the puddle, it begins to vigorously pump. exR slowly expands, but she pumps too vigorously. Suddenly the pump comes loose, and she shoots off down the tunnel like a balloon, closing in on the honda and the broom with a high, squealing sound.

*hears a funny noise*

*tries to check her bike over while driving at high speed (not a good idea, really)*

*starts to wobble alarmingly*

sheers off the honda, and it straightens out.Whistles around the bend(Hay, I'm beginning to like this) and heads into the home stretch. She's ahead, but running out of air...Sticks her thumb into her mouth and , picks up speed...

*after realising what the noise is, SM sticks it up to her top gear and guns it, slowly catching up...*

*busterbone chews his fingernails to the quick wondering who is going to win*

Chew,chew,chew.

*drinks *

*catches up*

*shunts ex, allowing Granny to zoom by and win the race*

*bike slides onto side, and skids past the post second*

SCREEEEETCHHHHhhh....

*And pieces of Sgt Mushroom skid past the post in third, fourth and fifth place*

*SM's head is picked up in one hand and placed on her torso*

*she then uses each arm to fix the other in the right place*

*assembels herself carefully*

Darn! I put my knees on back to front!

*Granny returns from the celebratory karaoke competition just in time to straighten out SM's knees*

That was fun, everyone ready for the second race? Where should we hold this one? Pouring over all and sundry in a passable imitation of Valentino (Dancing Baby) Rossi - with hair & female appendages

How about a canyon?

I got Slight's autograph

Canyon racing in jet powered hovercars. With water cannons!

Let's do it!

so, where's the canyon? ::hovercar idling, water cannon full::

Don't know

*sits on VFR leaning backwards, arms crossed*

I'll hunt one down or make one. see you tomorrow.

There are some HUUGE canyons on the surface of mars called the Valles Mariners system. They cover about 3000 km of the martian surface. We could put up a dome, giving the area gravity and air, and race there. We could start a new forum called Canyon Chaos beneath the whack-em races thread. all we need to do is list a few
souped up versions of the cars in the old wacky races cartoons, with jets installed, (spacehelmets optional.)

*Peregrin suddenly crashes through the ceiling*

Wha..? Where? Why are there huge caverns underneath my office?

*looks confused but then notices and starts munching it instead*