h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I didn't hear anyone ask for that but it sounds interesting, so hit me with one of those please bartender.

Figuratively speaking of course.

I'm afraid that the bartender is the world's biggest procrastinator
so it might be a long wait, unless you help yourself.

Good I'm glad to get rid of that one, now let's see, must be time for my sex break.

Oh, I'd better look the other way in that case. There's a naked lady over there, you see. Well, that is to say, you won't see if you don't look over there too.

God save Mrs Ethel Shroake.
Long live Mrs Ethel Shroake.
God save Mrs Ethel Shroake of 393A High Street Leytonsone.

Goodnight.

I'd go and look but it's too much like hard work.

So it was Mrs Ethel Shroake who read the Queen's speech the other day?

"Did someone ask for a "jack of grog" ?"

No, but that's close enough.

Avast there ye lubber and fill me black jack with grog.
Arrr.

Er, I think that's illegal in 35 out of the 50 states. And on a Sunday in ten others.

Well, that's North Carolina, South Carolina, Wyoming, Texas and Hawaii for you.*

* I picked those out completely at random. Apologies if I accidentally stumbled across a reality.

I suppose I could check up on that but I don't think I will.
I'm procrastinating over making , another thing to
consider might give me a nervous breakdown.

Messy Xmas

I finished the card.

Just sign it and we'll send it off.

Consider it signed

I've signed it too.


Shall we start on the next one now? We could do it in verse ...

What rhymes with 2001?

Guh? Grblah!

*shakes head*

Sorry about that. It was silent here for so long here that I appear to have partly lost my power of speech.

?

so erm i finally found this page, kept seeing links for it but didnt get round to clicking them.
i am currently procratinating lots, being on h2g2 is currently keeping me from posting important letters, washing the dishes and going to shout at my former letting agency (which will now have to wait until tomorrow) i am also putting off eating.

You're not putting off eating - you've promoted dieting.

Promoted dieting!?
You mean someone's actually got round to doing something?
I'll have to go and lie down...
oops, I am lying down.

hmm apparently so.

mini

I think this has gone off.

It's only been in the fridge since Easter

Cut the green bits off - it'll be fine