h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Who do you lot expect to clear this mess up?

Me? I should have known.

~wanders off swearing under his breath~

*Watches Arthur wander off.*

That is one recalcitrant being.

*She sets her small travel case on one of the many table-like apparatus and hangs a garment bag from a hook in the wall. Opening the case she removes a few items; balm, delicate (though surprisingly sharp) clasps, a small leather strip with a buckle, and talc. She slips her silk dress over her head and turns to puts it inside the garment bag. The damp chill effects an immediate reaction as she stands there in only her stockings and heels.*

~recognises the tools of the trade~

Do you need any help?

*Kicks off heels, then slowly peels off stockings...*

As a matter of fact, I do. As much as I love my PVC, it is a bit high maintenance. You could make the maintenance bit quite enjoyable if you are willing to coat me with the talc....

ok hon, I know the feeling. Rubber is the worst though.

~dusts Zmrzlina down with talc~

How did I get here? What this kind of land? It seems I'm well equipted I've got only my ropes in hand.

Oh my, Researcher 154901! And some mighty long rope!

Thank you for the dusting, my dear Mina. Do be a dear and hand me the black PVC with purple lacings. One really should be dressed for company.

Oh my what beauty. I cant seem to kick that habit. Beautiful women sitting on guns.

I would say...sitting on guns is the only way to make use of them.

Would you like to give me your rope?

Oh no, not guns...I hate guns. Now, a nice bit of leather...

Leather?
I've got lots of leather.

Want to share your leather, Mina?

*Zmrzlina finished lacing the front of her PVC catsuit.*

The best way to give this rope is to tie in over head. Jump on to the rope with a saddle you swing in. now a word of advice from a sage of mnts afar. "Breathe as long as you can."

Which bit would you like me to share?
The business end of the whip?

OMG--- I'll be back in a wittle bit.

Where are you going?

I suspect he is has gone invisible...they tend to do that when things get interesting 'round here. But...BluesSlider is still handy....

Tell me about it. Everytime I manage to drag one down here they leave again.

~looks around~ It doesn't look too bad in here I don't think.

Ooooooo!!! Damn, damn, damn. And now I have to take my leave Grrrr...

You won't miss anything, I have to go out to work soon.