h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*Phillipa, Mari-rae's useful niece, is at the door with a Welcome Basket overflowing with goodies. There are chocolates, assorted teas, cookies, bath salts, coupons for local businesses, and a note that says WELCOME in shaky, but legible calligraphy.*

Are you the new librarian? You're young to be a librarian, aren't you?

Gosh thanks - for all this stuff.

*Has a goood rummage around and lifts out the bath salts opens the bath salts and places a rare orchid into the jar

A-hah the very thing that should now dry perfectly...

* Sits on the desk munching chocolates in a casual manner - whilst offering the box to Phillipa

Am I young for a librarian? This is my first shot at it so I'm not sure how hold librarians should be

*Looks round for some form of hospitality to offer that didn't just come out of the basket.

Would you like a book?

*Phillipa, who looks like she never gets out much, blushes.*

Oh, sir! A book? Yes, I mean, if it's all right? What sort of book?

Oh we seem to have all sorts here ...

* looks around the shelves vaguely....

Ah, heres a nice blue one - I've always found them to be quite good. This one seems to have plenty of pages in it and some amusing pictures

* consider for a moment

But of course if you would prefer a different colour that's fine as well.

Thank you! Blue is nice. Do I need a library card to check it out? And how soon do I have to bring it back?

*Lady C strides purposefully into the library*
Good morning! I would like you to find me a medical book please. One of those large encyclopedia ones. With flow charts.

Phillipa my dear. Please greet your auntie for me. I'll be over to see her soon.
Lady C

Ah good morning Lady C - what a pleasure to see you

Don't worry about tickets and things Phillipa - I'll sort all that out - I'll send a note to your aunt if anyone else wants to see the book.

*takes ticket from inside of big blue book and hands it to Phillipa

A medical encyclopedia, Lady C - I'll see what we've got

* climbs up a ladder and finds a couple of dusty volumes. You could try "Dr Koop" if you want something modern or we have the "British Medical Journal" if you prefer ...


http://www.drkoop.com/
http://www.bmj.com/

Oooh thank you very much!
*thinks "How charming. Lovely monocle. If I have no luck with the doctor, I might just pop back here"*
Good bye!
*Returns to Riverside cottage for a good read*
Lady C

Could I join the library?

I always have time for a good book.
Sometimes I even have time for a shabby book.

Of course you may - we have both good book and shabby books and you are always quite welcome to borrow any combination.

We also have a music section if you would prefer to borrow tapes or CDs

May I link from the Town Library and Museum to your Village Library, please?

Marvellous, have you got any books about Aleistair Crowley? (or however it's spelt.)

Aleister Crowley - hmmm let me see what we've got

*unlocks safe, produces wooden box covered in arcaine symbols and locked with chains, unlock chains and lifts out leather bound book *

You're the first person to take this book out for a long time

* hands to Mina *

Will four week be long enough? People seem to go a bit odd if they read too much Crowley and the postage from Arkham is murder

http://netropic.speakeasy.org/crowley/
http://www.cix.co.uk/~mandrake/crowley.htm
http://www.geocities.com/Athens/Acropolis/1896/ACBooks.html

Hi Amy - nice to see you

Of coure, I'd be flattered to be linked to from the town library -

If your library is ready for browsers then would it be Ok if I put a link in here for the town library. I'm sure you can deal with a much wider range of requests than we can in this small branch library

Would you like a chocolate while you're here?

This looks perfect, thanks Lipsbury.
Four weeks is perfectly adequate, and I should be able to control myself while I read it. All those herbs can have a very odd effect as well, so I am used to it.

(And really, those arcane symbols are just showy, there's really no need, you're perfectly safe.)

Don't I get offered chocolate?

Sorry Mina, most remiss of me

Would you care for a chocolate?

Oh yes, thank you very much.

I can't say no to chocolate, unfortunately.

*passes Mina the box of chocolates now somewhat depleted *

Well it certainly doesn't show - I'm sure eChocolates are completely healthy sustaining and fat free as well as delicious - so please have as many as you want.

Thanks for the compliment, and the chocolates.

~puts box in her bag with the book for later~

*Closes the library as no-one is around
*Puts a note on the door
"Closed for the moment - any requests please drop me a note - Toodle Pip"
* Cycles off on monocycle