h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I am trying hard to recommend this posting...hope this works...

Oh yeah and I am recommending it because it is mine...and I wrote it....

Thanks
TMC

Oh and that should be Baudrillardian thanks

May be a interesting article but with the complete lack of any formatting whatsoever, its barely readable. Be sure to check out the GuideML clinic http://www.h2g2.com/GuideML-CLinic for tips.

Also, remember that by posting this on H2G2 you have granted The Digital Village a non-exclusive copyright to use your material.

I'll come back and read it when it's formatted in GuideML.

Okay I formated it...didn't realize I had a choice...I'm new I'm new!! And still learning....I can make it prettier now that I know I can....

T-

Ok. Well, it's formatted and looks interesting. I will read it tomorrow. My initial thoughts are that it is not Approved Guide material even if the pictures are taken out.

Also, as has already been pointed out, you must read the stuff on copyright in h2g2. Here's the link.

http://www.h2g2.com/FullTerms

Hello

The copyright statement is there for my benefit. Of course, h2g2 has unexclusive copyright because I have given permission as such. However, someone else on the board reading this "does not" have the same permission. I still own copyright even though I grant it to H2G2.

Thanks
Toni

I think it's a very interesting and well writen entry. Still, a bit of work could be done, to bring it more to the h2g2-format (font-size).

A few suggestions:

-Could you give infos as to who Baudrillard and Carl Jung are? You could do this in . Also explanations for words which sound like insider-terminology (simulacrum, Upamishads/Atman...) and some theories (Jung's theory of individuation) could be given. I would rather assume that people have seen the movie, than knowing these terms or thinkers.

-I think it would help a lot, if you could structure the whole thing with the help of and tags (eg 'Mirrors'; 'Images and Masks'; 'Names and Meanings': 'Morpheus', 'Trinity' etc.)

-What is 'Existence'? A book? An essay?

And I had the feeling, that there were some repetitions in the last bit. Could the entry be cut down a bit?

thanks for the good read

I like the article - well thought out, interesting and deep.

As for criticism, the content is sound - as the last post mentioned though, I think a bit more structure could be added, and some of the longer paragraphs broken down (eg. the long para on Jung). It does also need some of the repetition toning down, and the article needs to finish a little better, as it gives the impression that the last few paragraphs are random insights that you thought of later, and had nowhere better to put them. Perhaps put these snippets (eg the one about Neo's company's name ) in with some relevant material earlier on, and finish with a solid conclusion or final thought.

Just some suggestions mind - feel free to ignore them!

An article for the guide should be "Instructive, Informative and Factual". This article relies heavily on the reader having previous knowledge of the work of both Baudrillard and Jung and is therefore not as instructive and informative as it might be. It also contains much that is the author's personal interpretation, opinion and beliefs and, as such, deviates from being factual and is open to challenge by those with alternative viewpoints.

Having said that, several useful articles could be derived from this piece of writing. There is nothing in the Guide about the life and work of either Baudrillard or Jung, for example. Thereafter, A195635 The Matrix - Film Review could be usefully extended to include the influences of Baudrillard; the connection between the film and the thinker could be made more explicit than is currently the case in A40512.

For example, in the article in its current form the reader is left to make the connection between two quotations - one from the film and one from Simulacra and Simulation - by themselves. In addition, nothing is made of the significance of Neo's chosen hiding place for his black-market programs (a hollowed out copy of Simulacra and Simulation in which the chapter "On Nihilism" has been moved to a more convenient place in the book for the purposes of the film).

Alternatively the "breadth rather than depth" approach of the article could be retained and an overview of the diverse influences on the film could be added to A195635. Another idea might be to discuss various works of fiction (The Matrix, Bladerunner, the works of Douglas Adams?) in terms of the Baudrillardian vision.

As has already been noted, the structure of the article could be improved. It lacks an objective and eventually just fades away until it finishes. It reads rather like the write-up of lecture notes in which the student is keen to demonstrate that they were present and awake throughout the talk. The reasons for including Jung or Freud or any of the other thinkers mentioned is not clear and no attempt is made to create or exploit tension between the views of the various philosophers, thinkers and writers.

Finally, the use of quotations needs to be examined. They should be better connected to the text in which they are embedded and cited properly. It should be clear that the "quote" from Ecclesiastes is a quote of a quote. You notice that Baudrillard does not cite chapter and verse. Why? Try finding those words in your bible.

Editorial Note: This Conversation has been moved to the new 'Flea Market' Forum.

This is where we move any Peer Review, Writing Workshop or Alternative Writing Workshop Conversations where the original author has *not* posted to h2g2 for three months. This prevents the active Review Forums from clogging up with dormant entries, but in the Flea Market they can be picked up by others and polished off.