h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*isnt sure wether to laugh or help the animal. Decides to do neither*

Agrivated by the action of the lackey, who was supposed to be living for him but decided he was to lazy to even live for himelf and now lies lifeless near the doorway, Researcher lies still, then, in a fit of inactivity lies still some more.
Then faints from the exertion.

Ponders how to find lackeys who are immune to Lazy B*****d Syndrome. Gives up.

*Recalls the many brave researchers who have struggled to find a cure for LBS, only to get it themselves. Stops recalling this and falls asleep.*

....

*thinks - sorry... no, just a brain fart*

Recovering from his faint and at once overjoyed at hearing that there's a name for his condition (LBS). RNFaC lies still, in celebration he emits an actual sigh, and hopes that there will be lots of government funded lackeys appearing soon to study him and bring him more Guiness, (and maybe that keg of scotch).

Unfortunately the concious act of being "overjoyed" coupled with the "actual sigh" and previous exertion from his "fit of lying still" proves too much exertion for the course of several days.
Researcher slips into comatose state, in which he dreams of many kegs of scotch and many underpaid lackeys to deliver many hoses attached to constant feed pumps, he, in this dream, consumes the kegs and then passes out.

*Government researchers enter the room in the hopes of curing LBS. They distribute release forms so that they may gain test subjects for their studies. Unfortunately no form is returned, and the researchers are forced to give up. Several of them also contract LBS and fall to the ground.*

Revived enough to have a hangover. Sees release form, scrawls an R on the wrong line for name, RNFaC then realizes that he has forgotten how to form letters.
This might not have been so bad save for the fact that one of the Government Researchers has fallen across me, after very pointedly not giving me a Guiness.
Conciders trying to slither out from under the now terminally lazy Government Researcher, but then decides to slobber instead, as this requires less energy.

*Technoyokel appears - too lazy to log on as herself*
Snore..

*Decides to join Technoyokel asleep*

.!

.

oº0O

RNFaCat, makes faint grab at fish, misses, desides it's not worth the effort and goes back into coma, where there is still scotch left to drink.

Wonders if someone will come and spoon feed her chocolate if she looks weak enough*

i doubt it

thinks.....

Hellooo... I'm a lazy bastard and want to meet other like-minded people. Here's my contribution: You know you're a lazy b*****d when turning on the TV is too much effort.

hmmm

Ur right, especialy when its too much hassel even if you have the remote in your hand!