A Conversation for M2M2 - Realising you are gay

Help Needed

Post 1

Dengarm

Hi. I need some advice.
I want to come out. I am still in high school, my junior year. My school is mostly tolerent(I live in Southern California). I really only have three options on who to tell first. They are

-A. A straight friend. He is the friend I trust the most. However he hate the only other openly gay person he knows. I don't blame him I hate him too. He's not a nice person. But I'm not sure if how homophobic he is. I have tried to drop little tests in to casual conversation but I can make nothing of them.

-B Another straight friend. He is a dancer and I know he is accepting of gay people. He is also Muslim and knows how discrimination is. But I have herd him gossip some things that he shouldnt have. Some things that were very private. I want to come out slowly and don't want it leaked. So far everyone assumes that I am straight.

-C Someone who used to be my best friend. I moved away from him 2 years ago, but I still keep in touch by phone and we visit each other twice a year. I know he is accepting of gay people. I also know he can't leak it to anyone down here. He also can be very reassuring.

So, will someone please advise me on who to tell first and how to tell them? Please reply soon!

Thank you.


Help Needed

Post 2

musicstar

hi there maybe i can help i have been out for 6 years and understand what your going through.


Help Needed

Post 3

Dengarm

Thanks I could really use your opinion. What should I do?


Help Needed

Post 4

Steve

Hi there Dengarm

I know it is tough especially when your friends make these sort of comments about gay people while you are around, especially going through the things you are going through personally.

My smiley - 2cents worth of advice though is maybe they have never encountered some who is actually gay who is also a friend. Take it easy and let them know, I cannot promise that your friends will not continue to make comments, mine still do but usually in a jokey way when I'm around. But if they are true friends and that freindship is based on mutual trust they may well surprise you and stand by you should anyone else try and tease you about your sexuality. They may very well be protected their own right to do this but do it as freinds and not to hurt you.

Hope this helps.

Steve.

smiley - hug


Help Needed

Post 5

coffeeshaman

Id go for C. he seems a good choice. Then go on to A, then, if your not that scared of coming out, B.


Help Needed

Post 6

newemjx

hi there hunni if i were you id go for {c} i was born in a small town and growing up i found it so hard knowing who i could and couldnt trust,especially once it became to realising i was gay!so dont be afraid just go with your heart u no who u can trust!xsmiley - winkeye


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