h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

On what?
Anyway, let's try it.
*The two Dragonites move over to two circles drawn in the carpet on the living room floor. Twinkle stands in another, concentrates, and sets the crystal in midair in the middle of the circle.*
Mew, I suggest you prepare a large Light Screen for everyone in case this goes wrong.
Fafnir, Dracon...You know what to do.
Three, two, one, fire!
*The room is filled with the blinding light of two Hyper Beams with wavelengths perfectly sychronized. After the dots disappear from in front of everyone's eyes, the crystal hovers there, glowing brightly. Then, the glow, but not the crystal, seems to wobble and pulsate slightly. A steadily increasing humming noise begins to come from it...*
Um... That's not a good sign. *pulls out a calculator, punches a few numbers* Oooh, almost to the energy threshold, but not quite. Um... that would be an energy-magnified discharge of about... 10 to the 45th times the original energy... What?!
}MEW!! LIGHT SCREEN!!{
*punches a button on a small device on his belt, and everything of value in the house disappears into a pocket dimension. Also, he begins charging a cyan-colored barrier to protect everyone as a backup to the light screen.*

[Mackenzie waves her hands. There is a massive, lime-colored explosion, and when it clears the house is gone]

[Mackenzie] To answer your question, Twinkle, I was concentrating on trying to find a way to keep Lizzie in that prizon I made for her.

[YK] Where's the crystal?

[It lands on his head]

[YK] D'OH!

}It's right there!{

*Grabs it*
Thanks. Um, hang on...
*pulls out pokédex and points it at the dragonites*
Verify experience level.
[|Fafnir --- Experience Level 100. Dracon --- Experience Level 90.|]
Okay, sounds like I'd better do a bit more training with Dracon.
Actually, I was planning to move to another planet anyway, so the house isn't a problem. Question is, which? And, what do we do about this crater?

[Cut to Mackenzie standing in front of a bluescreen]

[Mackenzie] The problem with having a character like me is that, very soon, we run out of other problems.

[Cut back to Twinkle and the others]

[Mackenzie] This!

[The house reappears]

[YK] I suggest Dantooine. Yeah, a hundred years ago the Yuuzhan Vong made short work of part of it, but I live nowhere near that, and the land's healed enough that Link doesn't sense anything more.

[Nerfal] Wouldn't /you/ be better at sensing things?

[YK] Well, Link can sense some things I can't, and I assume residual nastiness is one of them.


I'll be putting up a Dantooine page pretty soon.

Ooh, that was nice. Anyway, does Dantooine have a moon? It needs to be a planet without any moons.

}Don't know.{

[YK] Nope. They got blown up last year when Y4K tried to make a seismograph using Dilithium crystals, three armed proton torpedoes, a copy of the H2G2, some chicken wire, and a wad of bubble gum, and he dropped one of the torps onto a Dilithium crystal and got beamed out. Are extremely dense rings okay?

http://www.h2g2.com/A488757

O-kay, everyone, back to the PokéCenter forum!

Hmm, would the curse recognize-
Oops! Never mind. I think it might be a possibility, it depends...
Incidentally, Mackenzie, do you mind if I study some of your magical abilities? I was impressed by the way you managed to store and retrieve my house like that, and was wondering if the magical ability you used worked anything like mine.

How about moving it to my space instead?

Too late. I've set things in motion that'll get Dantooine moved to the World of H2G2. The link is above.


[Mackenzie] [considers] I guess so. It'll probably be something different than what you're used to.

*closes his eyes and concentrates, and the area is filled with a weird haze. Multicolored auras appear around everyone.*
Hmm. That is interesting. The closest aura signature I've seen to yours is Mewtwo's. It seems to be an equal mix of mental and inherent magical ability, but there is that other weird color that I can't quite recognize... And, of course, your general energy is pretty strong too. Mind dong something minor so I can get an active reading?

[Mackenzie considers, and then turns YQ into a hamster. This sends a startling surge of red, green, then a sort of mauvy-pink through her aura. There is definitely something odd going on that makes Mewtwo look like a magician]

[YQ] [squeaky-voice] D'oh!

[Mackenzie] That do?

[YQ waves his paw and the illusion that he has been turned into a hamster fades away]

Wow... Umm... That is VERY interesting. The same pink weirdness with Mewtwo, but the red shouldn't have been there at the same time as the green... Odd indeed. I'll have to study that some more. Well, next I think we ought to see about Dantooine.
*A portion of the ground opens, and Twinkle's ship comes out. He snaps two pokéballs into slots on the sides. He opens the hatch and climbs in.*

[YK and Mackenzie board along with him.]

[Narrator] For those of you who missed the URL the first time, here it is again:

http://www.h2g2.com/A488757