h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I can think of only one reason for the invention of "Fake Chess". It is the screenwriter's inability to portray the characters as intelligent by any other meathod!

I enjoyed your article very much! It brings to mind a variety of fake actions done for theatrical purposes, such as......"The Fake Meal", where no food ever gets served; "Fake Drinking", how many full beers have been on set tables? The list could go on forever!

NM

We may be on to something right here... Maybe we could collectively submit these findings under 'virtual acting', where essential singularities in real life portrayals are explored.
One particular scene that comes to mind is that of the picture-in-picture or Fake Meta-movie, in which actors act as actors in front of a fake camera. This is the point where things inevitably start to go terribly wrong. Some actors will suddenly realize the lousiness of their job, and take this opportunity to show acting at its very worst. Others spontaneously regress into soapstar behavior. Still others will whoop with glee as their Inner Thespian Animal is released, and 5000 years of theater evolution are readily dumped.
As to the Fake Drinking.. who actually does get to drink the beer? Which brings another question to mind.. are Set Assistants paid well?

With enough free drinks, they may think they are paid well enough! (Not to mention all that free food no one ever seems to eat!)

I love the virtual acting scenes!!!! It gives a very good insight into how acting is NOT done!!!

NM

I think an article covering all kinds of fake actions by actors is a great idea! I always enjoyed fake typing and fake phone dialing. Saturday Night Live is the king of fake phone dialing, complete with fake phone dialing sound effects that don't match up with the dialing action.

fake driving is always entertaining, but nothing can top the fake motorcycling from chips. imagine if you could just drive along on 2 motorcycles keeping perfectly and exactly parallel and just casually chat about what you did on the weekend, what sort of donuts you should get when the film crew stop for gas and whether your moustache was straight. which brings me to fake facial hair growing. . .

Fake piano playing...(or any other intsrument, for that matter).

Must be nice to get paid well to play "air guitar"!

NM

Especially bothersome I find the occurence in B-rated vampire flicks of Fake Spontaneous Selfcombustion. I mean, we do have good examples in the real world! I watch Discovery Channel!

Re: Fake Acting article. I'll put it up as soon as I get rid of my Fake writer's block! Ideas, anyone?

Chris

The Partridge Family, Milli Vanilli, The Monkees, Mary Tyler Moore Show(fake newsdesk), Adam 12(fake driving), The Dukes of Hazzard(just how many '68 Chargers DID they destroy on that show?....and I promise, that car never jumped that far or that high!)

It goes on "ad nauseum"!

NM

fake breakfast. does anybody really eat this meal? this is people pretending to eat a meal which everybody else normally skips.

Ever notice how real food used in television commercials looks much nastier than fake food?

That's because you can't eat it!......It's either plastic or chemicaly preped to withstand the hot lights of a sound stage.

But wouldn't it be nice if the real stuff looked that good!

NM