h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

1. I accidentally divided by zero and my paper burst into flames.
2 .It's Isaac Newton's birthday.
3. I could only get arbitrarily close to my textbook. I couldn't actually reach it.
4. I have the proof, but there isn't room to write it in this margin.
5. I was watching the World Series and got tied up trying to prove that it converged.
6. I have a solar powered calculator and it was cloudy.
7. I locked the paper in my trunk but a four-dimensional dog got in and ate it.
8. I couldn't figure out whether i am the square of negative one or i is the square root of negative one.
9. I took time out to snack a doughnut and a cup of coffee. I spent the rest of the night trying to figure which one to dunk.
10. I could have sworn I put the homework inside a Klein bottle, but this morning I couldn't find it.

Absolutely LOL!!!!

Or the old classic: the dog ate it.

Or you could try 'The dog ate the question sheet, and I don't live near enough to anyone else to ask for theirs. And my phone is out of action. And I'm not on the net. And I can't shout that loud.'

For maths homework the classic of "It was Mathematically impossible fo rme to do the work in the time between you setting the question and the answer being due in and if you were to give me an extra week I will either give you the homework or the proof of why it is impossible to do" is always going to be a good answer.

a, I couldn't do the geometry because they don't let me use anything sharp where I live.
b, I had the answers on the tip of my tongue but when I licked the paper they just dissolved.
c, My dog ate it... but we've given it syrup of figs so you should get it tomorrow.
d, I've given up the things I like best for Lent. I really love Maths homework.
e, I came up with something really new and Steven Hawking is still looking at it.
f, Persuade everyone to withhold their homework (blackmail, bribery, threats and so on)and convince the teacher that none was set.
g, I er... I think I er... Do you think teachers and pupils can get married?

Thanks for those all of you, and I'll be updating again tomorrow, weather permitting!

Weather permitting? Why does the weather affect when you update your excuses page? Or is this one of *your* excuses?

*enigmatic smilie*

I've got one which actually happened. In 198_ my entire course went to the year tutur to ask for an extension because Titan had crashed the day before the deadline and we couldn't access our work. I then proceeded two days later to hand it in in longhand and wasn't marked down for it.

These are some of the things that work for my first period calc. course. There are only about twelve of us in the class so getting a group effort started isn't really that difficult. We usually all BS the fact that we dont understand or that as seniors we arn't motivated enough to get the work done (Senioritis), this has the great effect of the teacher spending the rest of the class either simply going over the work with us or just forgeting about it entirley.

Collusion is always a good thing. I'll try to update again soon, thanks for the input