A Conversation for Lord George Bentinck

Peer Review: A23648367 - Lord George Bentinck

Post 1

Kyra

Entry: Lord George Bentinck - A23648367
Author: Kyra - Get this lobster off my head! - U1572880

And back again


A23648367 - Lord George Bentinck

Post 2

swl

Hi Kyra. smiley - biggrin

A very neat and concise entry, which I enjoyed. But I must confess that I am left little the wiser. Why were the Corn Laws repealed? Why did he feel he was "being sold"?

Para 2 gives a lot of information, but almost in a rushed and breathless way. There are six names in one short paragraph which, for my addled brain at least, is a bit confusing. *I* know who Disraeli was, but others may not so it might be a good idea to explain this. The same point could be made about Peel and who was Duncan Watts?

While I'm not expecting you to spoon-feed the reader, it does help to explain the relevance of the people involved. It's also a mistake to assume the reader already knows about a particular point in history, so a bit of background could help.

Overall, I think this has excellent potential as a first class Guide Entry and I hope you can develop it from such a sterling start smiley - biggrin


A23648367 - Lord George Bentinck

Post 3

aka Bel - A87832164

I agree with SWL.
It starts with the first sentence:
>>Lord George Bentinck was the British Prime Minister George Canning's nephew, but he showed little interest in politics for most of his life<< This, to me, implies that he didn't show much interest in politics although he should do as the nephew of the PM, and not for his own position in the House of Lords(?).
>>The editor of the 1905 publication of Benjamin Disraeli's biography, Lord George Bentinck, - I'd omit the comma before the book title, because it wasn't clear (for me, at least), that Benjmin Disraeli was the author of this book, and that this wasn't a biography about Benjamin Disraeli with an odd title, which was how I first read it. smiley - silly

Bel


A23648367 - Lord George Bentinck

Post 4

swl

I've done a little sniffing around. There is a Wiki entry, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lord_George_Bentinck , but it is a typical dry and boring piece - the type that a good HooToo entry can trounce. Compare the Wiki piece with http://www.nottshistory.org.uk/portland1907/portland6.htm

Perhaps your entry could walk the middle line? Incorporate the dry who/what/when of Wiki and spice it up with the scandal from the notts entry. Weave the two together in your own words and this could be a really entertaining entry smiley - ok


A23648367 - Lord George Bentinck

Post 5

Demon Drawer

Ah an attempt to illuminate one of the lesser known to grace the UK's highest office. I agree with some of the comments above it needs a little more to set it apart. Currently it reads like the back cover of his biography and not much else.


A23648367 - Lord George Bentinck

Post 6

AlexAshman


You've got a few problems with quote marks, but otherwise this is a good, succinct Entry smiley - ok

Alex smiley - smiley


A23648367 - Lord George Bentinck

Post 7

Pinniped


It's a promising start, but there's more to be said here.

The reference to having Ireland at heart alludes to the fact that Disraeli and Bentinck brought Peel's government down by voting against the Irish Coercion Bill in 1846, in an act of pure revenge for the forcing through of Corn Law repeal in the previous month.

Note that Peel himself wasn't finally convinced of the necessity of repeal until the autumn of 1845, so nearly all the events described in the Entry belonged to the last three years of Bentinck's life.

I guess in the end it's a limiting choice of subject, this. Isn't the natural centre of the story Peel, or Cobden, or perhaps the Corn Laws themselves?


A23648367 - Lord George Bentinck

Post 8

Kyra

Okay, I had another go at this, but it's a bit hard have this make sense and avoid making it about the Corn Laws or Peel. Maybe I'll tackle them next.


A23648367 - Lord George Bentinck

Post 9

U168592

hmm. Short and sweet. Nice, but I felt there was something missing. smiley - sadface Not sure what though.


A23648367 - Lord George Bentinck

Post 10

BMT

smiley - boingsmiley - spaceHows this doing Kyra, not forgotten is it? smiley - biggrin




ST.


A23648367 - Lord George Bentinck

Post 11

parrferris

Interesting, but as someone who knows little about this period I felt as though I'd jumped in at the deep end - almost, in fact, as though a para or two were missing at the beginning. It would be nice to get a little more background, not just on the political situation but also on how Bentinck spent all those years before he came to politics. Hunting and racing may have been his passions, but how did he indulge them? What schooling did he have? Did he travel?


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