Scene 1

JB enters the Feline and Fiddle¹.

JB: A vod....
He sees the clientele


JB: Make that a pint of best, barman.
He takes a booth and watches the door....

Everyone inside is very silent, and no-one moves, except for their eyes.

In walks j'au-æmne², having given his agents the slip by the fountain.

Walks over to JB and pulls up a seat

J: New here?

normal background conversation resumes partially as a result

MUSIC: Strings strike up theme variation 1

JB: Yes. The name’s Bond, James Bond, and you are?

Bluebottle walks in and looks very strongly at Joanna, as if to tell her something.

J: Very happy to meet you, Mr. Bond

JB: Can I get you a drink?

BluesSlider places pint of Best on bar and looks enquiringly at j'au-æmne

Bluebottle looks at j'au-æmne again, and nods very slowly.

J: A TiaMaria and Cola, thank you Mr Bond.

Will you excuse me for a second? I need to go and freshen up
Stands gracefully, starts walking toward ladies room

JB relays the message to BS and adjusts his bow-tie.

Bluebottle walks towards the gents.

BS carefully mixes Tia Maria and Cola whilst observing j'au-æmne's exit


BS: One Tia Maria and Cola, Mr Bond.

JB notices Bluebottle’s movements and heads for the games corner, with a set of golf clubs³.

BS casually makes for the cellar.


BS: Just need to check the stocks. Announced to no-one in particular

INTERIOR: cloakroom in the F 'n F

j'au-æmne is seen talking to Bluebottle on a mobile

It’s worse than we thought. They've sent James Bond....yes....no, of course not....there's a back way.....through the cellars.....
Hangs up
CAMERA: on j'au-æmne's POV

Walks back into bar

Surveys the room, looking for Bond

CAMERA: Cut to Bond

James removes woolly cover from number 3 wood and give it a quick polish.

CAMERA: Cut to j'au-æmne

j'au-æmne walks over to bar, collects her drink, and goes over to JB.

Eomando walks into the F'n F. She looks across the room at JB and j'au-æmne, then sits down at a table near the door.

JB: Holding golf clubDo you play?

J: I don't, I regret to say, but I do enjoy watching otherssmiles

JB: A pity that is a considerable handicap, Miss? Sorry I didn't catch your name.

Bluebottle enters the bar and plays bagatelle. Why? Because no one has bagatelle at pubs anymore - they've all been replaced by pinball machines.

J: You didn't catch it because I didn't tell it Mr Bond.
half smiles

looks at him

Dancing Ermine walks in, in the background, sits next to Eomando

Eomando: A drink, DE?

DE: Coughs slightly


Anything to get the smoke out of my mouth. You could have told me it was a Q branch pen.

E: So you didn't notice that I'd handed you a "_pen_" and not a pen?
DE, honestly, sometimes I think you’re worse than James for forgetting to click those things an even number of times.
sighs to self

What can I get you?

DE: Lemonade, we're on duty.

Bluebottle starts typing on his laptop computer in a corner.. pretending to play "Pacman"

E: You're right. Two lemonades.
Gets up to go to the bar, and whilst passing Bluebottle she catches a quick glimpse of the screen

E passes JB and Joanna, and gives JB a meaningful look which Joanna can't see

E returns with 2 lemonades and sits down next to DE again
I don't know what that man over there with the laptop is doing, but he is NOT playing Pacman...

j'au-æmne Senses JB stiffen
CAMERA: Joanna's POV, pans round room

Stops on Eomando
CAMERA: Xtrm close up on j'au-æmne's face showing recognition and worry
CAMERA: Medium close up on BlueBottle

J: Will you excuse me, Mr Bond, I'm afraid I have work to see to.

Charming to make your acquaintance.

DE: We're okay, there isn't a transmitter plugged into it, whatever he's doing is restricted to the laptop. The girl with James has spotted you though.
Whispers harshly DON'T look round. We're just here for a friendly drink, remember, or at least that's what the cover is.

Eomando: Swears quietly to herself

Has a drink of her lemonade to tries and hide the fact that she knows that she’s been spotted.

j'au-æmne walks toward the door, hoping not to be challenged

DE: That means no following her out of here. If you leave before either the woman or the man with the laptop it can only be with me, understand?
sips lemonade

I'll follow the man if they leave before us, okay?

j'au-æmne leaves by the door, through which the fountain is briefly seen

as she leaves she looks around
CAMERA: Joanna's POV, pan around F'n F, camera stops on Bluebottle

j'au-æmne catches his eye and leaves.

E: Sure DE. looks sad... I won't go anywhere without you...but I've still got this awful feeling that she's up to something.

DE: We don't really have much of an option, we're not much use if we're spotted and she's suspicious enough as it is.

E: Solemly nods her head

You're right, I don't know what I was thinking.
Sips some more lemonade

DE: The trick is not to follow, so much as know where she's going and be there first.


I'd lay a bet that the bloke in the corner knows where it is too.

Eomando nods head but doesn't dare look round, DE was doing enough staring for the both of them

Finishes off her lemonade

DE: Come on lets go, we've left enough time to be getting out of here. James can handle the other guy.
Downs lemonade as he and E get up and go out door

BS returns from the cellar and notes the departure of several customers. He begins clearing the tables and moves over to Bluebottle's table.

BS: Can I get you a drink, sir?

A vodka martini, shaken not stirred.
MUSIC: Strings start up
CAMERA BS POV looks over JB's shoulder to BB in the corner with his laptop.

BS goes back to the bar to mix Vodka Martini, then takes it over to JB


BS: One Vodka Martini, shaken, not stirred.
Places drink on table, JB notices a note on the napkin which BS has placed under the glass.

DD: Picks up note and starts to read

Bluebottle, meanwhile, has got a high score on Pacman. You see - I was playing it in the background. Honest!

CAMERA: JB POV looking at BS’s note
Voiceover BS: James, I picked up a mobile phone transmission on the monitoring equipment in the cellar. BB and your erstwhile companion. DE and E are on her trail, I'll keep an eye on BB.

BS-003

DD: It's a letter to go to see M at a secret rendezvous. Walks out and into the Aston Martin, to get to the new location.

BS clears the glass and napkin in the knowledge that JB had picked up the encoded Braille message.

Bluebottle's pacman was eaten by a blue monster thingy Still, he had achieved all he wanted with his laptop, and wonders where the next location will be.

JB comes back briefly to pick up his woolly 3 wood cover before heading off to meet M at the Lab.

END OF SCENE