h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

A Sun, surf and sand. Reclining under the sade of an over hanging palm tre and drinking lemonade. The gentel smell of brownis coking in the oven. This is the life.

*queests around for the source of the smell, and eventually comes to a very large, very climbable tree. looks t in puzzlement. realizes that the aroma is coming from the trunk of the tree itself, and tentatively breaks off a chunk* IT'S BROWNIE!!! *picks up one of the large nuts that have fallen to the ground, and breaks it open* IT'S FILLED WITH CHOCOLATE CHIPS!!! *pick up one of the multi-coloured fruit that have fallen to the ground, and discovers that it has a tough, flexible skin. experimentally squeezes it.* IT'S A FROSTING TUBE!!! *checks more of different colours* AND THE DIFFERENT COLORS ARE DIFFERENT FLAVOURS!!! *picks one of the strange, grainy, multicoloured leaves off the tree* ITS MADE OF SPRINKLES!!! AND THE BROWN ONES ARE CHOCOLATE SPRINKLES!!! *walks away, noticing a new, strange tree. tastes the bark, fruit, and nuts from it* the bark s dark chocolate, the nuts are milk chocolate, and the fruit is different fillings! i taste mint, strawberry, cherry, chocolate sauce, and espresso beans so far. and there appears to be fresh fruit and berries of every description growing here too. yum! *sets up several hammocks to hang between the two trees, all well within reach of all the delights fo the two trees, and collapses n one of them. notices several gyser-like things in the ground nearby. walks over to taste.* hmmm..... appears to be cream soda, hot fudge, every type of coffee around, whipped cream(!!), and milk. i think if you want something else, this one over here *points to dry gyser* will immediately start up with whatever you said. and this frozen pond over here appears to be filled with ice cream. and here is a large stack of very big bowls, with this note:*reads note* none of these calories or fat count, and it will never be all used up. *takes a bowl, breaks off a sizable chunk of brownie into it, squirts lots of chocolate and vanilla frosting onto it, adds a generous portion of spinkles and chodolate chips, gets a few scoops of ice cream, lotsa flavours, nd tops it off with hot fudge and dark chocolate chunks. staggers under the weight of the concoction, and collapses into a hammock. picks a spoon from a nearby bush(?) and digs in. mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm............*

looks upon the seen and raisis his glas to MGoddess then gose back to relacsing.

Oh my, I apologize for not coming here sooner. The beach looks restfull.

yes, it is. except for all the caffeine. but it only affects yo if you want it to.

RedSky looks up from his slumber and ofers Marve some lamonade

Why thank you. I could rather use this at the moment.

*uses a glass to catch some of the lemonade from the fountain and has some too*

Wakes up from his morning nap just in time for he mid day nap

Rip Van Winkle... did you go bowling?

confusment... what you meen .... sleepy .... me no understan

aah! *goes into long boring post mode* according to the story, Rip van Winkle was a guy who fell asleep under a tree, dreamt he went bowling(nothing to do with cricket. the kind where you throw a large haevy ball at some pins to knock them over.) with giants(or possibly, gods), in a Valhalla-like setting, ie, lots of drinking and partying, and woke up to find that many decades had passed, everyone he had known was either dead or uch, much older, and no one recognized him. he may or may not have aged in the interum, while asleep, i think he didn't.

Never herd that story....


pleace tell me a nother one

well actually i had to leave a good bit out, but if you go to the site that is now at the bottom of my page, you will find the complete story. it has an author bio bit at the top, for the first 3 paragraphs, though, the actual story doesn't start until after the verse.
and sad to say i can't think of any more. like when someone asks you to "say something". after using the language for almost the whole of your life, you still hesitate, mind momentarily wiped blank by that phrase.

Gets up, streatces, brushs dust and cobweps of himself and starts looking fore his tepot.

*finds a teapot half-buried in a sand dune* is this it?

Has It got a picture of a lama on it?

*brushes off the encrusted sand, and peers at it* no, a camel.

If the camals wering a blue hat with a picture of a fish on it then it's mine

it's a red baseball cap with a shark on. how strange.