h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

ah! I take it cuckoo clocks are not your thing... There's the huge one in Leicester Sq. I've passed it many times and still have never seen it on the hour!

And why is it so hard to open crisp packets.... I never have understood that!

Well, they're not "proper" clocks are they? All proper clocks contain at least 4 Kg of brass (machined into beautiful cogs), interesting chains and weights and a decent "Boing" for the hour.
I've got the same prejudice about watches. After reading the opening of The Guide, I gave up digitals in favour of something that needs winding - but at least it ticks, so i know it's alive.
Time for a change of subject?
Greed, I reckon.
*having timed the change of subject to crisp packets*
After realising they could rip the public off, selling potato at $145 per Kg, crisp manufacturers decided to increase their turnover by designing the packets so that between 20% and 75% of contents would be lost upon opening. Their marketing plan for next year includes adding a delivery charge and selling access to a web site that sells special crisp packet opening devices.
All this thought makes you thirsty doesn't it? Another ? Or a Y of something, perhaps?

ooh... Menza has a very nice bottle of champagne around, its just I'm about to fall asleep on that sofa over there, and theres not much reason for celebration.... maybe tomorrow... *goes and falls asleep on the sofa*

Sleep well, FC - flights of angels,etc.. We'll leave the champagne on ice for a while.
*tops up drink; clings on to the bar and consciousness, determined to keep awake until the day shift starts*

The Day Shift is here. But Kes is not. Oh well.

Have you seen the pink Lego? Lego for girls. 'Nuff said. "Don't ask me I'm just a girl" (Malibu Stacy). .

Hello Amy. I hadn't gone. Well, just popped out for a .. well if there was a Gents' loo I wouldn't have had to ..
Let's start again. Hello Amy. Great to see you again. Yes, I have seen the pink Lego, and it is banned from our household.
Can I get you a drink?

Sorry, haven't got time

See you later.

Too bad - catch you later.
*finishes drink, rinses glass under tap. Looks hopefully at door, but all is quiet. Considers crashing out in the bar, but FC has already got the sofa. Heads for the door. Makes it.*

*Has a *
So if this theory about what you see in lego sooner or later comes into real life is true - very soon you'll be able to take people's heads off, and then give them a different body and wig - and essentially turn men into women and vice versa...

You can do that already, can't you? Well, if you're a qualified surgeon. And apart from the "taking people's heads off" bit, but that can't be too far away.

*BS appears behind the bar like the shop-keeper in Mr. Ben.*

Morning Gents What can I get you?

AAAAAAAARGH!!!!!! *runs away, screaming*

Hmmm, not the usual reaction I get to that enquiry .

*Pours for himself, just to get into the swing o things.*

I'll have a please BS.

What's got into EV?

Hey, though you didn't have time for a drink!

for me too please, BS!

Happy Lunchtime everyone!

That was three hours ago. I have returned and I am gasping for a drink.

I was just puting my mind to further work on my Programming for Kids article. (Flushed with success at submitting my very first article on Pharaoh Ants this morning).

An orange juice if I may BS?

I think EV's just gone a bit weird.

Right, that's , and a |_| .

Thank you, BS.

Thanks BS!

Signs are I may have had another article accepted... Possibly this is premature optimism, but my article on hotel plumbing has lost its 'edit' link, which is exactly what the last article did. Either that, or I'm about to get a rejection letter.

Any sub editors around here who understand the sequence of events?