h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

'Scuse me, but this is a Laddie's choice.

You trying to encourage or discourage them with personal visits EH?


(bog)chain letters, that's what we need. Something along the lines of "1st February is the National Botty Burp Challenge Day. Come to the McCrapper and play your part in pigging for victory. If you don't pass on this letter to twenty other researchers, you will instantly become eggbound."

Sent the text letters and none returned to me yet

Meant to tell you, Natalie is sending some goodies for the Quiz, thanks for the tip.

Watch it Wum!
...will go put me dancing shoes away

I left a message on 3SM's page, if he doesn't find it there this week I'll text him.

OK, OK Would you be interested in the slosh?

Heya, some nice fool bought me a mobile for Xmas. I'll finally be able to join the rest of the human race in saying "Where are you?" instead of "Werrahellumma?"

'ey oop, I've only just found me dancing clogs

Is it true that toesucking originated in Manchester as a means of removing skelfs from dancers' feet?

Hmm is skelf Scottish, it sounds awfy like it Jimmy. BRB

Nope, "Northern English", that should do.

Urrrrrgggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhh, ain't nobody gonna suck my toes

I've had a text back from the Captain, he's a definite maybe

Noooo. Don't tell me you do a Lister and pull out a skelf in your toe with your own teeth (without taking them out your mouth)

You don't get splinters from well worn clogs but I do have a son who bites his toenails

I can suck my own toes too, fantastic skill to have!

And you have reservations about dunking biscuits?

Not a reservation - I actually did the dirty deed and the resulting taste was horrible. Whatever possessed me to spoil my already great cup of the Grey I'll never know!

Ah.
Oil of bergamot would improve my feet greatly.
Where's the kettle?

You get oil of bergamot out of your kettle?

As Tom Lehrer didn't say:

"Kettles are like sewers. What you get out of them depends on what you put into them."

Like when you put water in them and limescale comes out?

Touché.
I shall take my topic drift elswhere.

And afterwards, I'll take it elsewhere.

"And afterwards, I'll take it elsewhere."

Is this the 'pov calling the kettle back?