Wickrain opened his eyes slowly.

Part Sixteen

Pine. A lot of pine. And grey benches. A very depressing shade of grey. And off-white paint. Make no mistake, he was in a waiting room. His whole left side ached, as though his entire self had shifted sideways at the same time¹. He got up slowly from the foetal position he was curled up into in the middle of the room and looked around. On one side of the room was a wall, which at first glance was exactly the same size as all the other walls. But when Wickrain focused on it, he noticed that it now filled his entire field of vision and had writing on it. He looked away. He was still in the room and in his peripheral vision the wall was the same size. He looked back. It filled his field of vision again. It was also starting to give him a headache, something he could really have done without.

'Hello there,'

said a deep, sombre voice behind him. He turned round to see who it was. A tall, dark man dressed in white approached him.
'And how are you? Nice trip?'

'Lorgnette...'

was all Wickrain could force out of his tired and battered body.

'Oh, don't worry about her. She's all right now. Pellicle put her somewhere safe.'

He sat down on one of the benches.
'Would you like to take a seat?'

Wickrain wandered over to the bench and sat down beside the stranger. The pain started to subside and he could think a lot more clearly now.
'Who are you?'

'My name is Jehovah. I am a native of the planet Mubua but for the last 5000 years or so I have been resident on your planet.'

Jehovah. That name rings a bell, thought Wickrain.
'Where... Where am I?'

'The waiting room. Anyone left in limbo waits here until their fate is decided. Sorry about the décor.'

Something was bugging Wickrain. At the back of his mind, he was trying to work out where exactly he was, and his brain could offer no logical conclusion. He certainly wasn't anywhere he'd been before. His brain did offer a slightly unconventional answer, however.
'I'm... I'm in the waiting room to heaven?'

'Yes.'

'And you're God?'

'Yes.'

'Oh.'

Wickrain had been through a lot in the last few days and was willing to accept just about anything people told him at this point. Something else was bothering Wickrain.
'What is this wall?'

He pointed to the wall that changed size.

'It's the wall of all those that have entered heaven. Next question.'

Wickrain turned back to the wall. All those that have entered heaven. Under 'H', a name caught his eye.
'Why is he on it?'

he asked dumbfounded.

'Why not? He was a leader of a country for over 10 years. And he led them in the best way he could.'

'Adolf Hitler killed thousands of people and took humanity to the brink of extinction!'

Wickrain shouted, gesturing wildly.

'Don't be so dramatic. Besides, Moses killed half the Egyptian Army and all the first-born of every family in Egypt. Do you think he shouldn't have been granted entrance to the gates of heaven? No, of course not. Because the good outweighed the bad.'

'But, but, the good didn't outweigh the bad with Hitler!'

Wickrain was on his feet, screaming to Jehovah.

'I don't know, he was an animal lover, a non-smoker, he loved his wife. He wasn't all bad.'

Wickrain couldn't believe what he was hearing.
'Don't worry, I'm only testing you. Of course Hitler was never admitted to heaven. But think of all the people that were. Some of them have killed, some of them have done bad things, but in the end, all that matters is if they're basically good. Whether their intentions were right. And Hitler's weren't. Nobody's all good, you're all just shades of grey.'

God smiled, the effect of which was to calm Wickrain down.

'Write that yourself did you?'

'Yes.'

There was an uncomfortable pause, as Wickrain realised he was standing up. He sat back down next to God.

'So, you must be the one who chose me?'

'In a manner of speaking.'

'Why?'

'Why do you call yourself Wickrain and not Reg?'

'You know why.'

'Yes, I do. Because Reg was your father's name and you don't like to be reminded of him. He was a brave man.'

'Is he in...?'

'Heaven? Yes, he is. He is basically good. And I chose you because of that. Your father was a good man and so I reckoned you must be too. In your own way that is. I knew you would fail, however, the Earth can't be saved by just one man. But I wanted to build your character. I might need you in the future.'

'You wanted to build my character? But why? I'm going to die, just like everyone else on this planet.'

God replied,
'Don't worry, Wickrain, this isn't the end.'

And God smiled.

The Earth fell off The Edge.

The Edge Archive

Oberon2001

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